Originally seen at goCoptic blog (September 19, 2019)
There is a woman who despises her femininity; loathes any sign of beauty that can welcome trespassers, like the time she was 7 years old. Because he took what was never meant for him, and amongst the broken pieces he shattered, he left her not only hating him, but hating herself too.
Behind her tough exterior, she is beautiful and she is soft. To everyone, she hides her vulnerability and femininity; no one ever thought to look deep into her heart. No one ever thought to ask her why. Instead, they criticize and laugh.
We sit in each other’s presence; ask questions like we are students of each other’s heart. She opens out her beating muscle and shows me every place that it has been pierced. And though there are puncture wounds that cause my body to shut down in anguish, I keep listening, and watch the map of her unfold before my weary eyes.
For we are more than what we choose to display on our surface. We are more than the stories we tell every day. We are all a uniquely precious story.
She asks me what it feels like to live with both my parents.
I tell her the truth; it is both beautiful and painful. Beautiful in the security and love I have always known. Painful because I know a beauty that many people have been robbed of. I tell her that sometimes it hurts and I think it is not fair, that I fight with God, asking why only me. I tell her I wish she had what I had. I tell her I’m sorry.
She tells me he raped her at 7 years old and no one believed her. How he’s still a free man, walks down the same streets as she does, without any punishment. She sees him, but can’t bear the thought or sight of him. She desires to kill him with her own bare hands.
Her father is a polygamist. Aside from her mother, whom he left, he now has two wives. He can afford to pay double of all her needs, yet he does not pay even a tenth. She loves him and she hates him, and she prays that he would know that someone in the world is searching for him. He tells her she’s an adult now, that she has no need of a father. But she looks at me and tells me she craves fatherly affection.
She asks me what it feels like to not be heard.
She asks me what it feels like to be disowned.
I am unqualified to answer. But I ask her right back.
What if we are called to be pursuers of each other’s stories? Instead of living on the surface of each other, caressing only the superficial layers. What if we are to whole heartedly pursue the truth in others, like when Christ met the woman at the well, pursuing her story beyond what people see and know, asking her real questions. Because to Him, the heart matters.
What if this is the real liturgy we are called for; the real work of the people? To hold hands and embrace hearts, to learn the story behind every war, and never let a day fall without calling out the beauty from the ashes left by the wars.
What if this is the real liturgy; witnessing the presence of Christ in everyday life? To behold Him in the man with post-traumatic stress, within the ache of every father wound, amidst the hunger for power and success, more than in the steeple and in the liturgy books?
Sometimes the books, the services, all equate to great things, but what if the Greatest is found on the streets? Like the Mama by the roadside selling fritters, who greets me daily, the woman who cries out for Jesus no matter how intoxicated she is. What if the battle stories, and the scars, those tears and the way they have formed behaviors are the most glorious thing we will ever encounter? Like Christ who lived most of his days not in the synagogues but on the streets, and allowed every interruption to befall him.
What if living lies right here, amidst the stories of love, loss and abandonment. What if these stories are what we are called to pursue?
This here is her story. This is her voice.
True Christian spirituality is not just about “my soul” or the “self.” Spirituality that is Christian is always about taking responsibility for belonging to others, about sharing their concerns, about bearing others’ burdens and washing each other’s feet. – Kevin Irwin, Models of the Eucharist
What can you do?
There are many with her story and others like her.
Of women with a broken past and they try to find their healing in the streets.
There are now over 20 women who work daily and not with their bodies. Some nights they are back on the streets, not to sell themselves again, but to reach out and empower other women. They take food to their sisters on the street, they pray and share the Word of God with them, and encourage them to come and start earning money in a new way. This ministry is now led by these courageous women who chose to leave the street that they may have life.
Sometimes the mission field sounds glamorous and easy, but for many of these women, leaving their former life behind is extremely difficult. After years of quick, easy money and sensual pleasures, it is difficult for them to now deal with the emotional wounds they once masked. Recovery and healing are a long road to walk, and we are so proud of our sisters for choosing to take on this journey.
The need here is greater than ever before, and the devil’s playground is ripe and ready for Gods laborers.
“being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ”
Have you ever heard that change is good? Change is not something we should shrink away from. Change is progress.
It is important to note that we are not changing the Faith, but progressing towards Mission as a way of life. We would actually change back to the original mindset. The Mind of Christ. The Mind of the Early Church was Mission and Evangelism. It is the Orthodox Way.
The goal is to have the Mind of Christ and the Mind of the Early Apostolic Church so the Mind of Evangelism can flourish in our Churches today.
We are not used to it because our mindset over the years, due to persecution, was more preserving the Faith. Or trying to adjust to immigration in a new county.
We are in a different stage now and it is time to go back to our original mindset. It will take great patience and humility for the Church to get back again.
Below are points on how we can reach the original mindset again:
We need the Mind of Christ.
Fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus
Philippians 2:2-5
It is our aim and goal to have the Mind of Christ. The way He thought and the way He served and moved. This is the way we should go towards.
The Mind of Christ is not merely having programs but loving others better than myself. Loving the unlovable, unbeliever and the lost sheep.
We need to be students again of the Mind of Christ and the way He wants it.
What are some of the characteristics of the Mind of Christ so that we can attain it?
Spiritually Minded
I must care about spiritually minded things and not have a carnal mind. (Romans 8:5-6). A carnal or earthly mind filled with selfish desires is death to evangelism and reaching out to all people. The spiritual mind cares about the salvation of others.
The problem is not having evangelism programs in my Church but not having a spiritual mind.
Humble Mind not Double Mind
Be of the same mind toward one another. Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion.
Romans 12:16
Today we hear a lot of opinions and we are set in our own ways. Are we open to listen and discuss? There are so many visions and opinions and not much humility.
Early on in my priesthood, I was very stubborn and shut down other ideas. I have since learned a valuable lesson in humility.
Like-minded
There are many verses in the Bible and the Early Apostolic Church that shows a focus for being like-minded and one minded (Romans 15:5, 1 Corinthians 1:10, 2 Corinthians 3:11, Philippians 1:27).
Like-minded means that there are no divisions among us. Yes, we will have disagreements and we will be different than each other but we have to work towards being one in our Churches.
It is ok to meet and pray and discuss ideas of how to make the Church grow and for the church to have the Mindset of Christ and Mindset for Evangelism.
We can’t look down at someone who didn’t experience what I experienced.For example, I have been in Africa for over 12 years and have some mission and evangelism experiences. I can’t come back to the States and judge everyone for not having the same focus.
No matter where we are in the Church and what we believe, never lose the unity and being of ONE mind. It is a process and we will get there as a Church. Let’s be patient during the process but let’s move one step.
Pray to Renew your Mind
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
Romans 12:2
This should be our prayer to get to the Mind of Christ. God renew my mind. Let Your will be done in my life and in our Church.
Don’t let us be like the world and conform to it, but help be part of saving it.
Before you are set in stone with something, let’s pray for God to renew our mind and soften it.
2. Mind of the Early Church continued to have the Mind of Christ
If you read the Book of Acts, you will see the great love and unity the Early Church had for each other. Because of that, many were being saved daily (Acts 2:42-47).
The Faith was not just statement in the Creed that was recited. It was the way they lived because of what they believed.
I think that is the biggest change we need to ask God to renew in our mind and our heart.
May we have the Mind of the First Church. We need to return to it.
3. Mind of Evangelism Today
Here is the hard part that I have seen in the Church today. We all have so many different ideas, cultures, beliefs, personalities, and baggage. All of it comes together at once and we become hard-headed on what we think should be done.
It is hard to find 7 people to agree together on any given topic. If we can’t be like-minded and have one mind, how are we going to reach out to even more different ideas, cultures, beliefs, races, personalities, and baggage?
We have to prepare ourselves and our churches for what God is getting ready to do. The harvest is ready (John 4:35) so GO!
As Orthodox Christians, however, many of us fall into a stubborn way of protecting the faith. Some would say that you should be like St. Athanasius and St. Basil so the faith doesn’t get watered down.
But don’t stop having the Mind of Christ while you do that. Let us be firm to protect our faith in a godly, humble way.
Let us listen and discuss and keep the forum open so we can grow our Churches in the mission area God has given us.
Main goal of this talk is to have the Mindset of Evangelism we will need for all to reach towards the Mind of Christ and the Apostles.
Let us work together without bullying each other or judging each other or hurting each other.
Imagine what the Church would look like in 5o years in North America and the rest of the world if we have the Mind of Christ, Mind of Apostles, and the Mind of Evangelism.
Will our children and their children still be in the Church?
We need to pray to change the mindset.
We are on the same team. Let us work together in to reach out. Let us look back to go forward.
So many people in churches for many years are talking about how mission trips changed their lives. Sometimes you wonder if there is any benefit to spending so much money to go somewhere uncomfortable just to say now I did a mission trip or post pics on social media. There are so many opinions on this matter, but let me just offer my opinion on how these mission trips benefited me and maybe how it can benefit you.
Touch God
I remember the first time taking a mission trip 20 years ago to Kenya and Tanzania. I was not really that close to God, but I heard about mission and wanted to try. Even though I was extremely afraid to go, I felt for some reason (probably God) that I needed to go. I went on this trip not knowing what to expect, but what I received was nothing I could ever dream of. In serving the poor and those in need and spending time with the children in Africa, I was touched with the touch from God. His presence surrounded me. That is when I really understood the verse: When you do it to the least of these my brethren you do it unto me (Matthew 25:40). This was referencing when we serve those in need. This touch healed so much in me and is still working in me.
Be His Vessel
There is no greater experience in my life, than being a vessel to transmit God’s love and message to others. But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. 2 Corinthians 4:7
Of course, we are not worthy of this great honor, but God desires and is looking for any person that he can use as His vessel. God wants to be present in this world and save His people. He wants to do that through us. Thus, serving on many mission trips and now living in the mission for over 13 years, I have seen so many times where God used me as His earthen vessel to transmit His great power, love, and encouragement to others. This is a huge reason why I recommend you to go on a mission trip. I am not saying this can’t be done where you are. But sometimes we need a spark that can light a fire in my life that will keep flaming continuously.
Overcome Your Fears
As I said earlier I had so many fears and excuses why I should not go on a mission trip. Later I realized, God wanted to help me overcome my fears.I had a fear to speak in public and pray in public. I was more of a quiet person to myself. God wanted me to look outward and serve outward and not just be to myself. I will never forget my first mission trip when all were required to preach in public in front of many. I was so scared that every time we were called to preach in public in the markets I would find a way to hide behind someone. Bishop Paul would call out people randomly to go and preach. After a few times, I almost perfected my ability to hide from His Grace. However, one time in the biggest market, I was caught and asked to go and preach. All I remember was that I was so afraid that I started to lose sight. Everything was blurry. So, I went up and started preaching. I don’t know what I said or if I even talked about Jesus, but that moment was life changing. After I was done, I felt a courage and boldness that overcame me. That boldness has continued from that moment until now as God continues to challenge me every day.
Now when they saw the boldness of Peter and John, and perceived that they were uneducated and untrained men, they marveled. And they realized that they had been with Jesus. Acts 4:13
Maybe God wants to help you overcome a certain fear? Mission trips are His training ground.
Mission Continues at Home
One of the greatest impacts I have seen from taking a mission trip is when I went back home to our church, I saw how much we who experienced this great mission applied what we learned at home. Honestly, I haven’t seen anything that grew our churches more than when groups kept coming back from mission trips and the zeal and energy and love for God inspired them to do more for the people in the church. Really the reward from mission trips were not just at the mission trips, but the impact was felt at home.
Conclusion
Should I take a mission trip? Most definitely, you and your family should sign up today for one. If there are no trips from your church planned then start organizing one with your leaders. If there are still no trips, then just come alone (email is below). You won’t regret coming, but you might regret not coming. I know it is hard to find time and money to go, but pray and start fundraising and you will see how God will complete it. It is not just about going to a trip and taking pics and putting it on Facebook. There is so much more God wants to do and sometimes He needs to take us from all our distractions so we can hear Him clearly.
I am so thankful for all the mission trips that I have taken in my life. It has developed me into the person I am today. Come, feed your soul and help feed the soul of others.
For everything in the world will perish except the soul because it is eternal
While the world is shut down due to the coronavirus pandemic, this could be a great opportunity to not panic, stay home, and sign up for an online course in theology!
Recently, I signed up for a course on Missiology from St. Cyril’s Coptic Orthodox Theological College in Australia. It was an online course and I am still going through the lectures. In the few lectures that I have heard, I have been challenged to grow so much!
Here I am – a missionary in Zambia for over 13 years – and I begin to think I know everything on mission! What a shock I was in for when I took this course! I still have so much more to know and to learn and to grow.
Being Coptic Orthodox from birth, I also thought I knew everything on our Faith. But what another surprise I was in for when, a few months ago, I signed up to study my Masters of Theology from Agora University. I have learned many more truths about our Faith and have been challenged to continue to grow.
Studying theology is helping me in my Faith journey but also helping me in my mission and service. It feels amazing when I can take the things that I have learned and guide my little ones or my church family. Personally, I am growing leaps and bounds and I am being challenged to a depth I have not had before. Learning theology is about life, meaning, belief and identity at the deepest level.
There are many benefits to studying theology. When a belief, a book, or different practice comes out and people begin to follow it, the person who stands on a strong theological foundation will not be so easily swayed. Even from studying Church History, you can see leadership struggles and challenges in the Church from the beginning. Therefore, when something occurs in your Church in modern-day, you won’t be quick to run away knowing your Church History and standing firm on a Church that remains strong in spite of challenges.
And of course, studying theology should never be head knowledge only but for you to grow from the learning. That it should impact the way we live and deal with others. If you are studying and you have not seen a positive change in your life, then something is not connecting to your heart. I should not become more elitist or superior and I should still learn from the child. I always have to check myself to make sure I am letting what I learn transform me into more of the image of Christ.
St. Evagrius Ponticus, a famous theologian and desert monk in Egypt said this: If you are a theologian, you will pray truly. And if you pray truly, you are a theologian.
Theology will not be learned through studies alone. It will be learned through silence and being in the presence of God. That is exactly how the Early Church Fathers were able to be teachers of theology. They were not trying to be theologians. However, they became theologians because they spoke out of the abundance of their hearts. Their hearts were full with a life of prayer, holiness, and silence. They were in the presence of God and through that, He gave them the theology and depth of knowing Him. Through their relationship with the One who speaks to them, they experienced, tasted, and saw Him.
If you are serious about Mission in our modern day, I challenge you to take any theological and missiological courses that can grow and challenge you. Force you to read more. Force you to think and grow more.
St. Paul, in his words to his disciple St. Timothy, said clearly, “. . . give attention to reading, to exhortation, to doctrine. . . Continue in them, for in doing this you will save both yourself and those who hear you” (1 Timothy 4:16). St. Paul knew the importance of devoting one’s life to reading and meditation.
We give attention to many things. We grow in many things. But the one thing we should give attention to is spiritual learning and growth, just like St. Paul advised St. Timothy.
If there are no courses physically near you, there are many Orthodox churches and seminaries that offer courses online. Find one and sign up today! There is never a good time and it does require time but it is so worth it! For your spiritual life, your family, and those you can impact in the world around you.
My Prayer before beginning this journey about 6 months ago (found in The Orthodox Way by Bishop Kallistos Ware):
0 Saviour, who hast journeyed with Luke and Cleopas to Emmaus, journey with thy servants as they now set out upon their way, and defend them from all evil.
I pray the Lord continues to guide my journey and guides yours as well.
God is working in the little things every day. From time to time he does beautiful, unexpected things as well. He wants us to know He is there and He is alive and working and is caring for our every step. The following stories were collected from the mission in Africa to encourage and inspire us to learn to walk in faith and trust that God is working even when we can’t see. This was clearly stated in the Gospel this past Sunday:”Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” (John 20:29)
We need to trust him more and ourselves less. I realized when collecting these stories that I don’t give God enough chance to work in my life. That I go ahead of Him and try to solve the problem instead of allow Him to work as He loves to do.
Sometimes having wealth can be a stumbling block if we allow it. People I deal with every day are living pay check to pay check and sometimes they wonder if they will eat tomorrow, pay the rent, and pay their children’s school fees. I see first-hand every day the beautiful people of Africa, their stories, their trust, and their perseverance to hang onto God throughout the trying times.
I learn so much from them and now I realize God didn’t just send me to help them, but sent me to Africa for them to help me. I am so grateful. I encourage all to read these stories and share your own below in the comments.
Life of Faith Story 1: God is Listening
One priest shared with me that because of unexpected expenses, there was no food at home. He told His family God will provide and to pray. So, they prayed and he went to church to serve. As he was in Church, he found the oldest, poorest lady of the Church saying I have something for you. She said I have a mealie meal bag for you (this is the staple food for most African Countries). The priest said no I should be bringing food for you. The Father refused to take it because she was a very poor elderly lady. However, she explained that she had unexpectedly received money from a family member. And she had a dream that night that the Father didn’t have food and to go and give to him. He received the food with great amazement. God answers on time and from the least expected person. To show that God is listening to this priest’s cries, He brought it from the poorest, not the richest person. When I heard that story, I felt bad for ever doubting that my God wouldn’t take care of me.
Life of Faith Story 2: A Choice to Make
A different priest had a wife who was pregnant and about to deliver and had severe headaches so she went to the hospital. They told her to stay longer because it looks like complications and she needs to deliver right away. They called the Father to come to hospital immediately and the doctor told him you have to make a tough choice: to save the mother or save your baby? What would you say in that situation? He refused to make the decision but as the Priest and Tasony talked and prayed they decided that they knew God will save both. Doctors tried to warn them and said that this is not one of the options. They insisted God will save both. To make it worse: before they could continue, the hospital asked for money for the procedure and at the time the Father didn’t have any money. Other doctors and staff working there were kind enough, without even knowing him, to give him what he needed because they were amazed by their faith. They started the procedure and by the hand of God both mother and baby were saved. The next morning the Father received money unexpectedly and went to return it back to those who gave. Let us trust God when emergency strikes. The Father told me that now He really knows God is alive. He knew it, but didn’t experience like that before.
Life of Faith Story 3: Power of Prayer
I wanted to ask the Bishop his experiences, so he told me a story of faith. Bishop Paul’s story was when he was priest in Canada. He was a new priest still not knowing what to expect. The economy was really bad and no one had jobs and they all asked him to pray for them to get jobs. So as a new priest he felt he was in trouble. If he prays and nothing happens, they will lose hope. He asked to be taken back to Africa, but the elder priest of the area gave him advice. Pray a liturgy every day and let people write their names and their problems and put it on the altar. Bishop Paul was afraid that maybe God wouldn’t deliver and he would look bad. But he proceeded to do it and pray liturgy every day with all his heart and faith. One by one, God answered their prayers and the people got jobs. He had to risk and trust and God answered.
Life of Faith Story 4: Blessings of Service
One leader said he couldn’t pay his school fees for his sons and they couldn’t take the final exam to pass for the year. These were critical exams and if the amount was not paid, then they will have to retake the entire year again. He and the family were disturbed if they didn’t pay by 11, they would have to wait one year. In the final hour, the Bishop requested he come for a service but he was reluctant because he was looking for the money. He went to the service anyway. After the service, the Bishop gave him a small blessing that was the exact amount he needed to pay the school fees. God delivers in the most critical hour and He never forgets when we serve Him and His children.
Life of Faith Story 5: More Blessed to Give
Another person from the Church in Africa had no food and was coming home with 5000 franks to help the family. This was the only money he had. Before he left the Church, a lady came running into Church crying that her baby was sick and needed prayers and money to visit the hospital. At first the man hesitated to give her knowing the money was for the food for his own family. However, somehow, he knew God would take care of him. On the way home, he knew his family would be disappointed. As he was walking, he ran into a man who was deeply disturbed and crying because his daughter got pregnant outside of marriage. This person advised him and started to continue on his way, but out of gratefulness the man gave him 10,000 franks which was double what he had before. He went home and right on time God provided all his needs for him and his family.
Life of Faith Story 6: Don’t Give Up
There was a woman who was frantically going from one hospital to another searching for anyone to save her baby, who was not responding. Every hospital she went to told her it was too late and that the baby will die. She came to Coptic Hospital and the doctor refused to give up. As the doctor was crying, he called the priests to come quickly and pray for the baby. They came and prayed and life came into the baby. The faith of the doctors and faith of the priests saved this child.
Life of Faith Story 7: Communion and Life
A priest had a young deacon who was sick and fell into a coma and was thought to be dead. The priest went to the hospital numerous times and it didn’t look good. Finally, he decided to attempt to give the young deacon communion. He touched his mouth with communion and breath was let out and the doctors said he must have just passed away. The priest insisted for the doctors to wait and he prayed. It was life being breathed into the boy by God not out of the boy. He finished taking communion and was awake but not talking. After a few days, the priest came again and gave him communion and once he took again he said his first word, “Abouna!” All the doctors clapped. The priest gave all the glory to God not himself.
Life of Faith: More Stories from the Deep Bush of Congo
Many times, in the middle of the remote areas in our long journey to our village churches, cars would break down and in one instance the car engine would catch on fire. Many times, I thought that was it. Over and over again, God would save.
We would see demon possessed people crying out for help and may times the Bishop and other priests would pray Psalms with all their heart and saying other prayers and spray Holy Water on them and demons would come out and later they would be baptized and follow Christ.
Sometimes because of civil war, a soldier told an elderly priest not to wear the black robe or he will be shot and killed because rebels were also wearing black. But he knew he could not remove the robe because it is his identity as a priest. They kept telling him to take off his uniform but the priest refused. The civil war finished and the priest remained unharmed by the protection and grace from God. The soldier who threatened the priest was actually put in prison and the priest was protected by God.
Conclusion
In conclusion, I can never forget the verse by St. Paul in Hebrews 11:6 “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.”
God always takes care of us. I pray these stories will encourage you and remind you of all the beautiful stories and events God is doing in your life. When things look difficult as we face this pandemic and death, look to Christ, the Lover of mankind. To encourage you more, I mentioned a few of these stories in this sermon about Believing.
To trust in God means to confide to Him our life, our fate, all our future, and to wait with confidence for the fulfillment of His promises. Hope proceeds from faith, as the plant from the seed, or the stream from the Source. – St John of Kronstadt
Mission Assignment: Tell your experiences with God that helped grow your Faith. Share them in the comments below – we would love to hear them. Share them with your children, relatives, and friends to give them hope and renew your Faith in God.
Adapted from The Purpose Podcast, hosted by Christina Ibrahim and Daniel Mawad, featuring Fr Mark Basily
To
understand the concept of having a relationship with God, we look back at the
beginning of creation of man. This begins to give us an explanation of the
necessity of a relationship with Christ, or the purpose of even knowing Him.
This begs
the question, why did God create us? Sometimes we need to look beyond the
standard answer of, “God is Love,” or “He did it because He loves us.” Anything
more than this may seem too difficult to comprehend.
To answer
the big questions, we can start with smaller questions; why do I want to have
children?
If you
think of it logically, it doesn’t make sense. Kids are a drainer; they drain
your money, your time, your sleep. And they give you nothing in return. The
reason why there is an inherent desire for children is the promise of a
potential relationship. This compels us to have children. To share love. To
enjoy life.
From here,
we begin to see why Christ wants to have a relationship with His creation. The
purpose of creation is to form a relationship, God is Love, and wants to share
that love. This may suggest that God was missing something before the creation
of man. The belief in the Trinity and the three Persons of the Trinity
nullifies this theory.
God was not
alone, and therefore did not need creation. He was already in a relationship
with the Persons of the Trinity. What makes Christianity unique is that it was
always about a relationship. God wanted to be in a relationship with humanity.
Thus, sin
can be seen as a break in the relationship with Christ. Religion poses a series
of rules, if you break one of these rules then you have sinned. This is a
constrained way of living, because if I step out of line that would make me a
sinner.
As
Christians, this is not how we perceive our all-loving God. All throughout
scripture, God presented Himself to the church as the Bridegroom. If this is
the relationship – as close as a bride and groom – then any break is not just
sin but adultery. It is being unfaithful to your Beloved. Christ presented it
in this way is to show that sin is missing the mark in your relationship with
Him; not a set of rules.
A key
difference in our relationship of God compared to our relationships with others
is that God will never give up on us. God gives us free-will and the ball is
always in our court to make a change. For as long as there is breath within us,
we are given the opportunity to know Christ. He presents Himself as a waiting
Father, take the parable of the prodigal son for example. The father waits for
his son’s return. He never gives up on creation.
Despite
this, we, as humans do not always want a relationship with Christ, even as
Christians. As humans, we’re clever at burying our heads in the sand. We search
for happiness and are often willing to pursue Christ if this doesn’t bring us
immediate satisfaction. Christianity can be too much, sometimes I just want to
live day to day, enjoy life. I don’t want to think too deeply. It can be a
struggle to be happy when trying to maintain a relationship with Christ.
How do we
get to a point where we are happy to strive for a relationship? There are so
many dimensions to take into consideration. If we have a journey with Christ, we
progress toward a destination, we should be quite confident that we are
developing a relationship. We are all at different levels, but on a journey. I
know Christ and I’m growing in faith over time. I haven’t reached the
destination but I am on a path that will lead to Christ. I’m not proud because
I’ve made it and I do not despair because I haven’t reached my destination yet.
What should
we expect on the journey? We all have a cross to carry, and the answer can seem
to be that if you have relationship with Christ then that is the solution. A
relationship with Christ transforms our life. It transforms the good times and
the tough times. When you are connected to Christ, you have His support, you
have power, you have patience, you have hope for a better tomorrow. The reality
is that we receive power by being connected to Him. When going through
difficult times, they don’t go away but I am given strength to push forward. In
times of joy, He magnifies my joy.
Having a
relationship with Christ is transformative, and pleasantly surprising even at
the start. We are more than physical beings, we have spirits and souls, we have
been breathed on by the breath of God. If we only live physical lives, then we
cannot be fully content. As soon as we embark on a relationship with Christ,
the void begins to be filled and this is most transformative part of a
relationship with Christ.
Our life
should be viewed in the context of eternity. Some people have extremely
difficult lives. A relationship with Christ helps, but it doesn’t make our
problems disappear. Christ Himself said, “In the world you will have
tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” – John 16:33.
He doesn’t
say, I will take away your problems, He says I have overcome the world. Be of
good cheer because there is another world to come. Even when I struggle, I have
another life to look forward to, and this is my hope in Jesus Christ. Will the
relationship help with my issues? Yes, it definitely helps, and there is power
and strength to help me overcome, but they do not disappear.
If we want
to start a relationship with Christ, the journey begins with communication. Narrow
is the path that leads to life and not many find it. The followers of Christ
are the minority. People come to realise that there is a place for Christ.
When you come to realise that nothing in this life satisfies you, there is only one conclusion – that you were created for another life
C.S. Lewis
We must
have been created for something more than the temporal world we know. Not only
do we claim eternity, but we enjoy life on earth in a different way. When you
taste God, the struggle becomes more beautiful, all good things take hard work.
Doesn’t mean that it’s not genuine because it’s a struggle. On the contrary,
anything that is precious, requires effort.
Our lives
can be transformed if we see Christianity as a relationship with Christ. It is
the pearl of great price.
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” – Philippians 4:13
I remember reciting this verse by heart. My mom always reminded me to recite that verse whenever I was feeling sad or alone, feeling anxious or desperate, or in any situation in which I forgot my identity in Christ. So what does it actually mean? What does it actually mean, that in any situation, Christ will strengthen me?
Since the perfect Being, had assumed imperfection on our behalf, He then had perfected imperfection. Simply put, Christ being God, strengthened our human nature through His incarnation. But He simply didn’t strengthen it. He perfected it, blessed it, and sanctified our human nature. God became man, that man may become like God. And as man, Christ had endured so many hardships that we are also bound, or if not already had encountered. Christ was mad when people were selling and stealing things at the place of worship; in His Father’s house.
Christ had felt sorrow when his beloved Lazurus had died. Christ had felt deceived when He had witnessed Judas betraying Him for an easy thirty pieces of silver. Christ felt anxious and scared at the cup that He would soon be bearing, to the point that He had sweat blood. Christ felt abandoned and sad when His life-long disciples had left Him in the night of Gethsemane, when
He was being arrested. And Christ had felt rejected when Peter, His most outspoken disciple had once swore to die for him, but instead denied Him; not once, or twice, but three times. Christ had felt pain and humiliation when He was beaten, mocked, nailed, and stabbed. Christ had went through it all. But the God who had endured these things, emerged victorious in them, because He is God.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me , means that I can overcome any obstacle, or all things , because Christ endured all things , and became victorious in them.
Whenever I feel alone, anxious, broken, betrayed, scared, or angry, or even faced with the very fear of death, I am reminded that Christ too went through these emotional and physical sufferings. So, I too can be victorious in them, because Christ overcame these things and was victorious in them.
The message
of this gospel is hope. For any despair, any despondency, this is the answer.
Hope
because of the restraint of Saint Matthew. Saint Matthew was restored to his
original rank that was a Levite. We need to understand what a publican is and
what a Levite is.
A Levite
belongs to a group of people that the Lord chose to be consecrated in the
temple. They lived in the temple, they don’t work and the temple covers all
their needs. An entire extended family would be sustained in this way. Levites
had an extremely high rank, like priests and deacons of the church.
Unfortunately,
it is not made known how he became tempted to pursue riches. He applied for the
role of publican of the Roman empire. A publican collects one tenth of the
money the people earn and gives it to the Roman enemy. This one tenth should be
given to the temple so that he, and the other Levites could live. He didn’t
choose this path, but chose to work for the Romans.
Publicans
get help from the Romans and are given police officers so that they may collect
money from the people. Each district had to give the Romans a certain amount of
money each year. Each publican was able to take as much money as they saw fit
from the people, and they had police officers to protect them. You can imagine
the hate the people had for the publicans, especially one that was originally a
Levite.
It can be
considered a priest in Egypt that loved money and devoted his efforts to collecting
money from the Christians to the ruling authority (which in Egypt, would be
Islam).
However, this
man had something different in his heart. He did not feel it was his place to
be a publican. At some point, he realised that he was not born to be a
publican. There was still hope that he could return to the temple, that he
could repent and be restored once more.
This day is
a feast of hope, because we all have a similar outlook. Sometimes it isn’t
money, but other worldly pursuits that interfere with our search for Christ.
Do I have hope? Can the Lord restore me?
The Lord
was passing by Levi and all his riches surrounding him. No one can befriend a
publican, he is not allowed to eat with people because he is considered defiled
among the Jews. Only his colleagues that are publicans like him. He was
boycotted from the temple. Great despair would have arisen within him.
The Lord
said two words to Matthew, “Follow Me,” and he left all his money and in great
joy, he knew he was restored.
This is our
hope – that one word from the Lord can unite us back to our Beloved.
Following
his restoration, Levi held a party and invited many people. The catering and
cost would be extremely great. He could not invite the Jews, but he had to
invite the sinners, publicans like him. How dare he make a feast of the Lord?
The Lord entered into a house that was considered defiled. Maybe he heard of Zacchaeus,
and how the Lord dined with him. The difference was that the Lord invited
himself to Zacchaeus’ home. He may have heard this, and this gave him courage
to invite the Lord.
Christ went
to his house that day and dined with sinners and publicans. This angered the
Jews and they saw this as betrayal. Jesus responded to them saying, “I have not come to call the righteous, but
sinners, to repentance” (Like 5:32). He came to restore the sick to
repentance. He is One of them. Today is the feast of hope. The church, in her
wisdom, prepares for today before another great feast – the Transfiguration.
How can I see the glory of God when I pursue the world? Jesus came to restore
us to our original rank as His children. The desires of the Lord entrap us in
sin and this is the day I say to the Lord, “tell me as you told Matthew. When
you tell me to follow You, I will follow You all the days of my life.”
Originally seen at Phoebe Farag Mikhail’s blog Being in Community (April 28, 2020)
A little bit over a year ago, my first book, Putting Joy into Practice: Seven Ways to Lift Your Spirit from the Early Church came out. And ever since the global COVID-19 pandemic began, the question of joy during this time of quarantine, stay at home orders, overflowing hospitals, widespread sickness, and numerous deaths comes up again and again. As speaking engagements converted to online meetings and webinars, the question came up again and again. How is joy possible in the midst of so much that is stealing our joy? After some time of struggling with the answer myself, and sharing different ideas with different audiences, I’ve come up with one answer that’s working for me: we can maintain our joy during this time by taking our thoughts captive.
200331-N-OE749-0057 NEW YORK (March 31, 2020) Army Spc. Daniel Fields, assigned to the 9th Hospital Center, takes a patient’s blood pressure reading in the Javits New York Medical Station (JNYMS). Soldiers, along with Department of Health and Human Services personnel and other federal, state and local agencies began operating a field hospital out of the JNYMS, March 30, to care for non-COVID-19 patients in an effort to relieve the burden on local hospitals, allowing them to focus on coronavirus patients. (U.S. Navy photo by Chief Mass Communication Specialist Barry Riley/RELEASED)
Watch the news (or visit a hospital in New York City), and you will get a sense that we are in war times. We are fighting an unseen force that we don’t completely understand and cannot fully control. This unseen force uncovered vulnerabilities in our society we didn’t realize we had, or didn’t want to admit we had.
As in war times, we are all doing our best to contribute to the war effort. Soldiers on the are health care workers and essential service workers. Doctors and grocery store cashiers, nurses and gas station attendants, emergency medical technicians and internet service providers. The rest of us are shopping for the elderly, sewing face masks for frontline workers and for each other, and donating money when needed. Some of us are finding ways to support local businesses, and sharing information about new jobs and other forms of economic relief. Authors and artists, libraries and museums are offering ways for us to enjoy the arts without having to travel for them.
However, when we ask those on the frontline what would be most helpful to them during battle, the answer is simple: stay home. Staying home, staying put, that is how most of us are contributing to win this invisible war. And staying home is its own sort of battle.
At home, stripped from our usual amusements, our numerous ways of living outside of ourselves, our multiple commitments that seemed so important until they were suddenly not so important at all, we are fighting a battle with our thoughts. Even those of us for whom being home during this time means juggling remote work schedules with our children’s remote schooling requirements, our thoughts still intrude on us whenever we need to get things done.
I’m one of those finding myself juggling more than I was before the quarantine. I manage my children’s schooling, cook and keep the household running during the day; teach my own students remotely in the evening, and then work on writing, grading papers, and lesson planning well into the night. My husband and I tag team when we can, though he faces even more of a workload than I do.
Still, in the midst of this, anxious thoughts invade.
What if one of us gets sick, what will happen to the family? What if our parents get sick? How long will we have to live like this? What if one of our incomes stops?
Angry thoughts invade.
What if the information we have is wrong or incomplete? What if the politicians don’t make the right decisions about public health?
Thoughts of despair invade.
What if everything I’m doing now is meaningless?
We stop our work to scroll the news, latching onto anything hopeful. We can’t focus so we get on social media to reach out to the friends we can’t see in person. Our shiny, bright screens are there to offer us distraction, but they’ve lost their luster. We try to get back to work, to the task at hand, and the thoughts keep pressing to the forefront.
Blogger and cartoonist Nic Hartmann drew this visual response to this blog post this morning (c) Nic Hartmann 2020
Left unchecked, sometimes those thoughts consume us, rendering us unable to focus on what is important and necessary. They turn into irritability towards those around us, or even lead us to seek distractions that numb us to the worry and pain—such as screen addictions, alcohol, even drugs. In other words, these thoughts unchecked lead us to what the Church Fathers and Mothers call “the passions.”
In my book, I talk about the “Joy Thieves.” While Christ’s crucifixion and resurrection conquered the great enemy of joy, death, there are still thieves that want to steal our joy. “These passions, or logismoi, also called “thoughts” and sometimes called “demons,” include gluttony, lust, greed, anger, envy, sloth, and vainglory. Each begins with a human thought or need that is not, in and of itself, sinful,” I wrote. Yet these thoughts, if they take root in our hearts, can steal our joy.
Footbridge to the fortress at St. Macarius Monastery, Egypt (c) Phoebe Farag Mikhail 2017
Centuries ago, a few Egyptians willingly went out into the desert and carved out cells to live in, stripping away almost everything that occupied them in the world, and facing headlong the same battle with their thoughts and passions. Some did so as hermits, others did so in communities, just as some of us are facing stay at home orders alone, and others with families. They’ve been doing so for at least 1700 years now, taking to heart these words from St. Paul:
“For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ.”
A brother came to see Abba Poemen and said to him, “Abba, I have many thoughts and they put me in danger.” The old man led him outside and said to him, “Expand your chest and do not breathe in.” He said, I cannot do that.” Then the old man said to him, “If you cannot do that, no more can you prevent thoughts from arising, but you can resist them.”
Balance of the Heart p. 122
What are these weapons of warfare for bringing every thought captive? Well, they are the spiritual practices. How do we resist? By putting them into practice. Each of the spiritual practices I mention in my book are also ascetic practices, honed by the Christian tradition over centuries. During quarantine, I have found three of them particularly helpful: praying the Hours, giving thanks, and arrow prayers.
Arrow prayers came to my immediate help whenever anxious thoughts intruded.
Trying to force myself to focus on whatever was at hand was a fruitless effort. I finally realized there was no point in trying to prevent the thoughts from intruding. Instead, I turned each one to a prayer:
“My Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, protect us.”
“My Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, remember this sick person.”
“My Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, comfort this family.”
“My Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, give the leaders wisdom.”
“My Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.”
(c) Phoebe Farag Mikhail 2019
“Arrow prayers” are short prayers that call upon the name of Christ in word or intention, and can be easily repeated throughout the day while doing other tasks. Although they were started by the desert monastics, “arrow prayers are for all of us,” as I write in my book. Some are short verses from the Psalms, like “Save me, O God, for the waters have come up to my neck,” and the most popular one is the Jesus Prayer: “My Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.”
Arrow prayers help us pray unceasingly, help us feel peace and stillness when repeated often, and go straight to God’s ears when prayed in adversity. They are the prayers that my spiritual father recommended to me specifically for helping me calm my anxious thoughts. “Your thoughts can be your enemy, or you can make them your ally,” Anne Bogel writes in Don’t Overthink It. Arrow prayers help make my anxious thoughts my allies instead.
Giving thanks came to my rescue when angry or irritable thoughts intruded.
I’ve occasionally come across the memes chiding us that we are “not stuck at home, but safe at home.” And while this is a nice sentiment and a good perspective to have, it doesn’t consider those who might not be safe at home, or those who have no home at all. It also doesn’t fail to shame us for the difficult emotions we are processing, even when we are safe at home.
Yet, we are called to give thanks to God “in any condition, in every condition, and in whatever condition.” That means we are called to give thanks whether we are safe at home, not safe at home, stuck at home, and even if we have no home. Thanking God for our safe homes, if we have them, is only the beginning. Giving thanks in a way that helps us experience joy starts not by counting the blessings we may be privileged to have, but by remembering the people through whom God shows us His love.
On particularly hard days, I’ve gone through my gratitude journal just to remember the people I’ve been thankful for and how they’ve shown me God’s love. I’ve made lists and started writing thank you cards for them to mail. At a time when it’s difficult to get together in person, a letter is a still a physical way of reaching out. I talked about giving thanks this in greater depth on this webinar with Paraclete Press. The desert father Abba Copres said, “Blessed is he who bears affliction with thankfulness.” (From the Sayings of the Desert Fathers, translated by Sr. Benedicta Ward).
Praying the Hours came to my rescue when despair intruded.
The “Hours” are times of the day—in the Coptic Orthodox Church, seven times during the day—for prayer. Each “hour” of prayer (it takes only a few minutes) is primarily made up of Psalms, and no matter what hour we pray, there’s always one Psalm in which the words express despair and trouble—but always end with hope in the Lord. Not only this, but the Psalms are full of what desert father Evagrius of Pontus calls “counter-statements,” as Nicole Roccas describes in Time and Despondency. Counter-statements are scripture that “talks back” to the thoughts that plague us, and Evagrius has an entire manual of these for different destructive thoughts, or passions. These verses are to be used to “cut off” destructive thoughts. One of his favorites comes from Psalm 43:5, which is prayed during the Third Hour in the Coptic Prayer Book of the Hours:
“Why are you cast down, O my soul?
And why are you disquieted within me?
Hope in God;
For I shall yet praise Him,
The help of my countenance and my God.”
Psalm 43:5
When we pray the hours regularly, we repeat the Psalms until the words become our own, as St. Athanasius said. Some verses can also become arrow prayers, and others, like the one above, counter-statements. In moments of despair the verse asks me the question, “Why are you cast down, O my soul?” Nothing that casts me down or disquiets me can keep me down when I am reminded to put my hope in God, who knows all things and promises to be with us when we are suffering.
An Orthodox nun in the Old City of Jerusalem along the Via Dolorosa, (c) MJ Yostos Photography 2020
Many of us are suffering from a sense of isolation. Loneliness has been a struggle for so many even before these days of social distancing. Even before we were asked to shelter in place for what has now been over a month, we have already been living increasingly isolated lives, each of us moving through life in a whirl of commitments and activities that make us impervious to one another. The loneliness was already crushing us before it became enforced.
Praying the Hours takes us out of loneliness and into a transcendent connection with many others, both on earth and in heaven.This is because the practice of praying the Psalms at fixed hours of the day pre-dates even Christianity. These words have been prayed by generations. Even Christ Himself prayed them, and Christians continued to do so, especially in the monasteries, where the days are ordered by the Hours. As I write in my book,
The moment I pick up my prayer book to pray, someone else is praying the same prayer, someone else has prayed another prayer a few moments before me, and others will be praying when I stop. In this way, when I pray the Psalms, I become part of an eternal chorus, even if it seems like I am praying alone. “For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them” (Matthew 18:20).
Putting Joy into Practice, p. 37
When we pray the Hours we are never alone. And when we pray the words of the Psalms, we are filled with hope rather than despair.
These are three of the tools the desert fathers and mothers have used for centuries to do battle with their thoughts—during times of persecution, plague, and famine. We know they work because they continue to use them, and so can we. We may not be able to get rid of them entirely, but we can resist the destructive thoughts with these practices, and take our thoughts captive.Not only this, but through them we can experience the joy that is only found in the giving and receiving of sacrificial love.
Contrary to popular belief, it isn’t a recent phenomenen. Very clearly, St Paul addressed anxiety in his Epistle to the Phillipians. Going back further, Solomon in the Proverbs discussed anxiety and worry. I dare say, our father Adam, anxiously walked out of the Garden of Eden after hearing the words, “cursed is the ground in your labors.” (Gen 3:17).
However, neither is anxiety an abnormal response. In fact, it’s crucial to our survival. Imagine yourself standing in a jungle, face to face with a lion who has just finished fasting for lent. On the menu? You. Your natural response should be, RUN. Reacting to stressors, and taking action is completely normal. It is critical to our survival.
So, where is the problem? When you’re sitting at home, and you perceive that uni assignment, task, meeting or phone call to be that lion about to eat you alive. Except you’re not in a jungle, and you’re not facing a lion.
While there is danger, it’s not nearly as bad as what we make it out to be. Anxiety is a distortion. It is distorting the facts of reality, making a mixtape of these distortions, then playing them on repeat. Over, and over, and over again.
This is good news! Why? It means something can be done about it. A physically unwell patient in a hospital is always joyful and hopeful to hear that their illness can be treated or cured, as opposed to being terminal. Similarly, we have the power to take a very active role in keeping ourselves mentally healthy. Just as a physically unwell Christian will combine both prayer and sacraments along with modern medicine, so too must anxiety be treated.
Often, especially as christians, we make the distinction with anxiety that it’s either a mental/physical problem, or a spiritual problem. There is no such distinction. Humans are not purely spiritual or physical beings. Anxiety, as a mental experience, has a clear physical state that can be measured, diagnosed, and described. However, as these physical signs accompany biological responses in our nervous system, as such they produce thoughts, affect emotions, and produce other physical and mental responses.
Our physical and mental experience of course cannot be separated from our spiritual one either. We cannot discount the importance of our relationship with Christ, the King of peace.
A contemporary elder of Mt Athos makes this observation:
The image which we can use to describe the relationship of soul and brain is the violin with the violinist. Just as even the best musician cannot make good music if the violin is broken or unstrung, in the same manner a man’s behavior will not be whole (see 2 Tim 3:17) if his brain presents a certain disturbance, in which case the soul cannot be expressed correctly. It is precisely this disturbance of the brain that certain medicines help correct and so aid the soul in expressing itself correctly.
Elder Epiphanios Theodoropoulos
I would like to offer some advice taken from St Paul’s epistle to the Phillipian, that we can use to help achieve this inner calm and stillness, and help combat anxiety.
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7
We hear this verse a lot, and sometimes we roll our eyes, “yes yes, prayer, but what else can I do.” St Paul is promising a lot, peace that surpasses all understanding, it means no one understands how or where this peace came from. No one can give you this same peace.
Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you.
John 14:27
If we’re given this promise, we should take the commandments seriously. Keep in mind, St Paul wrote this verse from prison, not on holidays in Santorini, or at his holiday house in the countryside. Prison, for the crime of being Christian.
So what is St Paul commanding us?
Firstly, to be anxious for nothing. Easier said than we’d done. Don’t be anxious about that friend that ignored you, that job you lost, the exam you have in a week that you haven’t studied for, the bills that are piling up. Nothing. Does that mean it all magically goes away? Unfortunately not. That friend may very well be upset at you, you still don’t have a job, you might fail that exam, you still don’t have money for those bills. But let’s go back to the promise, we’re not always promised solutions, we’re promised peace. The peace of God. However, in gaining that peace, I now have greater strength, focus and grace to pursue solutions and to open my eyes to a way out that God is providing. I can confidently learn a new skill and find a job, I lovingly confront my friend and resolve the conflict, I get a wake up call and learn new ways of utilising my time to study, I learn to be generous with my money and not be concerned with how God will look after me.
The reason that the Bible and the Church fathers are so adamant on the path of suffering being the path to salvation is this; in suffering we partake in the same path that Christ took. More than anything, this is our calling, to share with our Creator, our God, our Bridegroom; to share in His suffering is to share in the Resurrection after the crucifixion, to share in the Kingdom of Heaven. The same Kingdom of Heaven that is within us.
The second commandment, in everything, by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.
St Paul here gives us the other extreme. On one hand, “Be anxious for nothing”, on the other hand, “but in everything”. Whatever we may have been anxious about, past, present or future, he’s saying, turn it into a prayer. We crucify the anxiety, and raise it in prayer. If anxious and worrisome thoughts consume my mind all day, imagine turning each thought into a prayer. There is now a very real chance of attempting to “pray unceasingly.” Orthodoxy continuously teaches us this method of spiritual growth and progress. God glorifies our weaknesses for His glory, turning anxiety into peace, pain into healing, death into life. One of the most powerful tools for this is the Jesus Prayer. Fr Seraphim Rose in the book, “His Life and Works” says,
“Pain and suffering drive one to seek a more profound happiness beyond the limitations of this world. I am at this moment in some pain, and I call on the name of Jesus, in Whom alone we may transcend this world, may be with me during it, and His will be done in me.”
Finally, “the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
We are promised this peace, which is beyond comprehension, and we are promised protection by this peace. Peace guards our hearts and minds from the worries and fears of this world. It shields us from those destructive and intrusive thoughts that shatter our inner peace and gnaw away at our connection with Christ.
This peace also doesn’t make sense. We don’t understand how it works, we don’t understand why it gives us so much strength and grace. In guarding our hearts, we are shielded from attaching our hearts to any other loves that are not Christ. Our emotions, feelings and desires are redirected towards all that is holy and pure. In protecting our minds, our thoughts, conscious and unconscious are transformed and instead of leading us away from our Creator, they lead us to Him.
