fear – Upper Room Media Blogs

Afraid To Be Free

By Fr Antonios Kaldas,

Originally seen on Fr Antonios Kaldas blog site, 8 October 2012

Most people take it for granted that each of us is free to choose in life. But some philosophers, such as Jean-Paul Sartre, claim that most people do not really want to be free. Choices have real consequences, and freedom brings with it responsibility. People do not want to be held responsible for the consequences of their actions. What if I make the wrong decision? What if the consequences are bad? I don’t want to be held to blame! I don’t want to feel guilty. And so, people seek ways to shift the responsibility on to someone or something else, whether they know they are doing this or not.

One famous way of doing this is “the devil made me do it”. But a more subtle way of shifting responsibility is to lay it upon God, or upon His representatives on earth. Sartre points out that when a person adopts a faith, they surrender some of their freedom. They surrender the freedom to decide for themselves what is right and wrong, for by subscribing to their faith’s moral code, that decision is taken out of their hands. Of course, each person is still free to choose whether to obey their faith’s moral code or not – they are still quite free and quite responsible in that sense, but they are no longer responsible for the content of the moral code itself.

Now I do not see this as a bad thing in itself. We humans are, after all, quite fallible, and we have a disturbing tendency to try to cheat to make life comfortable for ourselves. If there is a genuinely objective right and wrong in the world (as most people would agree there is), then we are much more likely to find it when God tells us what it is than when are left to work it out for ourselves. We are just far too prone to seeing things in ways that are convenient to us instead of seeing them as they really are.

But there is a variation on this that can be quite harmful and can do a lot of damage. That is, when we confuse the Truth of God for the teachings of men. All men are fallible, whoever they are. Jesus Himself criticised the scribes and Pharisees for teaching the precepts of men as if they were the commandments of God. Perhaps this too is a responsibility that each of us has, to do our best to distinguish between those moral laws that are of human origin and those that are divine. As a priest, it is incumbent upon me also to specify clearly to people when I am “quoting God” and when I am speaking off my own bat. There is a big difference between me encouraging someone to forgive someone who has hurt them and me encouraging someone to make a particular career choice I think suits them.

It is a sin to surrender your freedom to another human being. Just as we cannot say, “the devil made me do it”, neither will the excuse, “but I was just following orders” carry any weight. Few people today would excuse the foot soldiers responsible for carrying out the atrocities of Nazi Germany or Bosnia because they were “just following orders”. And yet, we humans appear to have a disturbing need to obey even the worst of orders. The famous experiments of Stanley Milgram last century are testimony to that horrible reality about us.

Yet this disturbing tendency seems to crop up in all aspects of life. For example, many employees are daily tested as to whether they will follow orders and do things they know or at least suspect deep down to be immoral. Students in a school playground are daily tested as to whether they will just follow the crowd or the popular kids instead of standing up for what they know to be right.

And it happens in Churches too. How many people in the Catholic Church were aware or suspicious of the terrible child abuse that is only now being gradually uncovered? Why did so many otherwise decent, compassionate and honest people remain silent about it? Quite simply, because they were told to, whether overtly or implicitly, by the hierarchy of the Church. And they surrendered their responsibility to these leaders. As a result of this silence, the abuse continued for far longer and spread far further than it should have.

There are practical reasons for accepting responsibility. Pastor Martin Niemoller was imprisoned for taking personal responsibility for speaking out against the Hitler regime. His chilling words illustrate one of these reasons:

First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out – because I was not a Socialist.

Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out – because I was not a Trade Unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out – because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me – and there was no one left to speak for me.

As Christians, we cannot live alone. We do not have the luxury of saying, ‘it’s fine, so long as I am alright’. As the Desert Father said, ‘our life and death is with our brothers’. Anything that hurts another human being hurts me, for we all share the same image of God. As Christians, we are our brother’s and sister’s keepers. This is what divine love means. This is the love modelled by Jesus ‘who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross’ (Philippians 2:6-8).

Whether we like it or not, we are free. It was God who created us free. Free to help or ignore others in need. Free to stand silently while atrocities and injustices are perpetrated, or to speak against them, whatever the cost. And yes, we can try to surrender this freedom to make life a little less scary for ourselves, but the price for such a surrender is high, O so high! It is nothing less than our very humanity itself.

Original blog available at- http://www.frantonios.org.au/2012/10/08/afraid-to-be-free/

Many Mansions

Many Mansions

Adapted from a sermon by Fr Samuel Fanous

The Gospel provides us with a lovely image of death. Christ says “In my Father’s house there are many mansions.” This imagery is sometimes lost because he said this to poor fisherman, rather than the rich. Thus, it was something glorious for the people present. He gave them the perfect image of death. He said that everything that you longed for in life will be received at death. You will have it in the Father’s kingdom.

If we reflect on Christ’s references to death, most of them are joyful and positive. Very few are negative. The Kingdom of Heaven will be a glorious place. Christ attempts to inform the people that the Kingdom of God is a happy experience.

When people think about John’s Revelation, people think of the apocalypse and horror. But that in fact was not John’s focus. Rather, he aimed to provide a message of comfort to those who were in persecution. Upon close analysis, although it has scary imagery and judgements towards Rome and evildoers, it was a message of comfort to the believers.

“God will wipe away every tear.”

These are all messages of comfort. The messages of fear are those opposed to God. They are told to be fearful, the persecutors, the Jews. To His own people, he provides a message of hope, that there will be many mansions and will live comfort. Christ was portraying the perfect image for the people present during His sermon.

However, nowadays there is a changed perception towards death. One filled with fear and anxiety. Perhaps this is due to the ambiguity surrounding death. The unbelievers fear this greatly as they have no clue what to expect. What will happen after death? Where do we go? Thus, they choose to spend life not thinking about death, to focus on the present and ignore what is to inevitably come. However, we should not follow in this train of thought. We should be prepared. We must think of death often to come to the realisation that we should not fear death. What are we truly afraid of? Death is the gateway to Heaven. Why should we fear entering Christ’s Kingdom?

The day is coming for all of us. No one is exempt from encountering death. No matter a day from now or 50 years from now, it will come. To encounter that day in tranquillity and joy, we must change how we live today. If today was your last day on earth, what would you do? You must continually prepare yourself. That day will come, but will you be prepared?

? Full sermon ?

A Fox Named Fear

By: Avi Ibrahim

Original post by Becoming Fully Alive blog site

“NOW IT occurred that while the people pressed upon Jesus to hear the message of God, He was standing by the Lake of Gennesaret (Sea of Galilee).
And He saw two boats drawn up by the lake, but the fishermen had gone down from them and were washing their nets.
And getting into one of the boats, [the one] that belonged to Simon (Peter), He requested him to draw away a little from the shore. Then He sat down and continued to teach the crowd [of people] from the boat.
When He had stopped speaking, He said to Simon (Peter), Put out into the deep [water], and lower your nets for a haul.
And Simon (Peter) answered, Master, we toiled all night [exhaustingly] and caught nothing [in our nets]. But on the ground of Your word, I will lower the nets [again].
And when they had done this, they caught a great number of fish; and as their nets were [at the point of] breaking.
They signalled to their partners in the other boat to come and take hold with them. And they came and filled both the boats, so that they began to sink.
But when Simon Peter saw this, he fell down at Jesus’ knees, saying, Depart from me, for I am a sinful man, O Lord.”
Luke 5:1-8

Upon reading this passage, so many thoughts came to mind towards Peter and his state. I mean, Peter, you just witnessed an incredible miracle. Aren’t you curious? Don’t you want to know the secret behind what this man just did so you can try to repeat it and enjoy early retirement? You allowed Him on your boat before He showed His awesomeness, and now you want Him to depart?

And it kind of hit me. I’m not too far from that reaction when presented with something Holy and Good. There’s a small sense of worry poking its way with its snout into the heart of that moment.

“This really shouldn’t happen to me. He must have entered the wrong boat! Perhaps, He doesn’t fully know the extent of my sins. It’s only a matter of time before I ruin this?”

It initially smells like the incense of humility but it’s quite the opposite. If it succeeds, I find myself getting out of that boat immediately and walking away. And I would walk away missing that moment when Christ calls me by my name and affirms me by telling me “Fear not! I am entrusting you with this.”

I’d fail to realize that the smell of sweet incense was coming from Christ, humbly entering into my boat. It’s fear that lurks in, welcomed openly by pride, that causes me to reject the gift of His presence. I’d think of my own condition. I’d glance at my calloused hands and the dirt in my nails, ignoring His gentle embrace. Consumed with my state, I can never enjoy His warmth and feel the fullness of joy in that moment. I entered my boat broken but I’d leave it broken, hopeless, and alone.

A few verses down from that passage you’ll find how Matthew (Levi) responds to meeting Christ; sinful Matthew makes a great banquet for Christ in his own sinful house and invites all the sinful tax collector friends he can gather (Luke 5:29). Wow!!! It’s not like Matthew was unaware of his state. He was a tax collector, that title was a scarlet letter he wore around. But he entered into the grace of that invite with celebration, looking onto Christ and not his brokenness.

Why let pride welcome it’s pesky friend, fear, so that we remain friendless? Why let that fox steal an opportunity to have a party, celebrating His presence? Why let it steal my Joy?

Later in scripture, Peter will be proven right countless times as to how sinful he is (and some of these moments are very public) but I guess that’s what it takes for him to ask for Christ to draw near to him as opposed to depart.

“Draw near to me, for I am a sinful man O Lord!”

And in the moment that He does draw near, his identity is transformed. “I the sinful” becomes “I the loved”, “I the embraced”, “I the joyous”.

There is a great song by John Mayer that describes a man talking to his love saying “If my past is any sign of your future, you should be warned before I let you inside.” In its essence, it’s saying “I have full confidence in myself messing this up, and I have a proven record in doing so. My fears are preventing me from experiencing the goodness we have to offer.” The song is called “I don’t trust myself with loving you”, and the title is rightly stated but there would be no hope for this man if the song is left as it is. His trust in himself and his sense of value would cause an endless cycle of failure; the relationships he’s failed in would fail to bring in any new ones. Although the person in this song may have every right not to trust in himself, he may have toiled all night on his miserable boat with no reward, he would be foolish not to trust, love, and enjoy the person who comes into his failed state and accepts him.

But aren’t we all foolish sometimes, our pride casts a verdict on ourselves keeping us behind imaginary prison bars when we should really be celebrating our freedom. So let’s put up the party banners and send the invitations! Let’s be more like Matthew!

Original blog found at- http://becomingfullyalive.com/a-fox-named-fear/

How to Control Your Thoughts

How to Control Your Thoughtsby Fr Anthony Messeh

Reposted from http://www.franthony.com/blog/how-to-control-your-thoughts

Fr Anthony Messeh is an American Coptic Orthodox Christian living in Arlington, VA. The aim of his blog is to spread the message of a real, relevant and rewarding God.

That title is a bit misleading (but it sure is catchy isn’t it?). You can’t actually “control” your thoughts – at least not in the same way that you can control other things, like a blender or a remote control car or a group of dancing robots.

It would be great if you could, but you can’t. You can’t control every thought that comes into your head. Thoughts will creep in that you have no control over. For example:

Insecure thoughts: “I’m not good enough and ______ probably thinks I’m annoying.”

Fearful thoughts: “I’ll never be able to fix this or get to that point in my career, marriage, etc.”

Negative thoughts: “My life is so difficult and everything is working against me.”

Impure thoughts: (no explanation needed for this one)

Dealing with thoughts like these isn’t easy. It can be debilitating at times. It feels like you’re in round 4 of a 15-round sumo wrestling match with this guy. No matter what you do, the thoughts just keep coming and coming and coming…

Is there a solution? Is there anything we can do? Or are we destined to be slaves to our thoughts forever?

Jesus said, “And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” John 8:32

The solution to your thought problem is often the exact opposite of what you might think. The solution isn’t to REMOVE those pesky old thoughts, but rather to REPLACE them.

Imagine you have a 1,000 gallon tank of water. Imagine that it’s full to the brim and you want to empty the water of it. How would you do it?

You have two options:

Option A: try to pick up the pool and dump the water out (aka, the dumb way)

Option B: throw a rock in (aka, the smart/I-obviously-listen-to-Fr.-Anthony way)

What would happen if you tried the first option – to pick it up and dump the water out? YOU WILL FAIL. You will fail and you will be exhausted as well. That’s because trying to REMOVE the water doesn’t work.

But what would happen if you tried the second option – throw a rock in? A little water would splash out. And if you threw another rock in? A little more would splash out. And what would happen if you continued to throw rocks in there – one a day every day for 10 years?

ALL THE WATER WOULD BE GONE!

The same is true for your thoughts. Stop trying to remove your old thoughts and instead seek to replace them. How?

Below are four ways (or rocks) that you can use to replace those negative thought patterns.

1) TALK IT OUT

As long as your thoughts remain hidden inside your head, they have power over you. But once you let them out, they somehow become a lot easier to deal with.

2) READ A LOT!

Reading is the fastest way to put new thoughts in your head. For me personally, there is no more important habit than this. I believe that reading will bring more fruit into life – when done consistently – than just about any other spiritual practice. It certainly has for me.

3) PRAY, BUT NOT A LOT

There’s a good way to pray about your thought problem – “Lord, I surrender my thoughts to You and ask Your Holy Spirit to guide my thoughts this day.”

And then there’s a not-so-good way to pray: “please God help me to stop remembering my mistakes and thinking that I’m a bad person. I know I made mistakes but please help me to stop remembering them all the time – especially that one mistake that was just so awful. Please please please help me stop thinking about that mistake and how awful I am…”

Prayer is good, but obsessive prayer is not good. The kind of prayer you need is the kind that a) is THANKFUL, b) is TRUSTING, and c) PRAISING.

4) JUST SAY NO!

Learn to reject thoughts that you KNOW are not true and from the devil. JUST SAY NO! Say what Jesus said when His disciple Peter introduced a thought that He didn’t want/need to hear, “GET BEHIND ME SATAN! You are an offense to Me, for you are not mindful of the things of God, but the things of men.” (Matthew 16:23)

Trust me, if you struggle with your thought life, you are not alone. It is something that everyone struggles with to some degree. Believe me, there’s help for you. You don’t need to live as a slave to your thoughts forever. But you must be committed to taking small steps every single day and being patient as those small steps add up to major changes in your way of thinking.

See more from Fr Anthony Messeh at http://www.franthony.com/