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The Beautiful Dove

Personally, I’m not sure I’d like being called a dove…I guess beautiful dove does make it a little better. So why do we call St Mary the beautiful dove. Surely it has to mean something.

Referring to St Mary as the beautiful dove is not common in other Christian denominations but it is very common in the Coptic church. Many of our hymns that speak about St Mary mention her as being the beautiful dove. So why do the Copts use this term more than other Christian denominations. What does this term “beautiful dove” refer to?

Across history and cultures, the dove is recognised as an image of peace and hope. Christ tells His followers to be as “wise as serpents, and harmless as doves” – Matthew 10:16. There is something about seeing an image of a dove that makes you feel like everything will be ok. Which brings us to the reason why St Mary, the beautiful dove, is so often used in the Coptic Church. The Copts for many years have been under persecution, and while martyrdom is seen as an honour, it is easy to understand that the desire for peace is in the hearts of the Copts. It is in those same Coptic hearts that a huge love for St Mary, the mother of the King of Peace, resides. St Mary feels the heartbreak of her persecuted children and takes these broken hearted prayers to the Lord who cannot refuse His mother. St Mary is the beautiful dove that brings prayers of peace for her children to the throne of the Lord.

Perhaps more fittingly, the term refers to the dove that Noah released from the ark. The dove flew out of the ark and came back with a branch to let Noah know that the flood waters had receded. Likewise St Mary takes the prayers from the ark of the Church and brings them to the Lord who answers her prayers with a message that the floods of the world will not triumph over the Church. It is an amazing thought, that those of us who are in the Church, surrounded by the floods of the world, not only have a messenger to take our requests to God, but also to send us peaceful comfort from God. A hope of something better.

It is here the beautiful dove takes on another, more modern meaning. In a time where the world is facing new and difficult challenges, a world where man and woman may mean different things to different people. Where wars are becoming more accepted. Where standing up for what is right or wrong is classified as bigotry or outdated thinking, we now more than ever need to cling on to a hope that transcends our world. A hope that good can still overcome evil. A hope that the heavenly is still valued among the earthly. A hope that is seen in the beautiful dove, the bearer of the source of peace and hope. St Mary the beautiful dove. It is very important to note though, that although we are safe in the Ark, the embrace of the Church, we are to pray for the receding of the harmful waters in the world; not just for the salvation of the Church, but of the whole world, even those that may bring the most harm to us.

The last thing I wanted to speak about is the term beauty. I wonder if St Mary in this modern day would be considered beautiful by our society? Would she be fully dressed in designer? Would she pay thousands on her image? I can confidently say no, because even in her time she dressed simply, as a temple servant, and was of such a selfless nature that she spent more of her time worrying about others than herself. Of course there is nothing wrong with taking care of yourself, but if that is our only definition of beauty, then we only need to look at St Mary. What made her beautiful was not just her appearance but how she made others feel around her. She carried herself as a faithful servant of God who always put others above herself. This humility is what we as a Church call beauty! This love St Mary can’t help but show for everyone is the truest kind of beauty.

Beauty for our hearts, peace for our spirits, hope for our minds, St Mary truly is the beautiful dove.

WHO IS YOUR SAUL/PAUL?

September 15, 2017

Originally seen on Fr Anthony’s blog (15 Sept. 2017)

Today’s guest post comes from Bradley – a graduate of George Mason University’s School of Conflict Analysis & Resolution, who currently works for the government and volunteers in his community. Bradley is also a proud member of St. Timothy & St. Athanasius church in Arlington, VA who has guest posted before. You can follow him on Facebook as well. If you too are interested in guest posting on my blog, please visit my Guest Post guidelines for more info.

“By day the banished sun circles the earth like a grieving mother with a lamp.”

Even for those of us that seek to avoid it, these days it seems the brokenness of the world is inescapable. We are divided in our nations, our communities, and even our families. Old wounds reopen, buried grievances resurface, hidden tragedies are revealed. The way we communicate and engage with each other is changing faster than we can process.

Every debate seems like a matter of survival, everyone who sees the world differently can seem like the enemy, every fight must be won decisively and in an instant, and we feel tasked with defending what is good, just, and right. And often, in the momentum and noise of such things, I don’t stop to ask, “Lord, what would You have me do?”

Cormac McCarthy, writer of the words above, is known for imagining beautiful, but bleak landscapes. The quote is pulled from a book depicting a father and son trying to survive in an American wasteland after some catastrophic event. McCarthy is known for trying to capture our most dark parts, but often leaves his readers with little hope when his narratives end. We as Christians are called to see this darkness, and, armed with justice and mercy, to walk into real stories like these, humbly, beside our God (Micah 6:8).

When God writes, like McCarthy, He doesn’t ignore brokenness; but instead, using ordinary and broken, He finishes the story with redemption. When God writes the story the sun is not banished, it is His rejoicing champion (Psalm 19:5). When God writes the story he reminds us our grieving mother is not only holding a lamp, but interceding for us, each day. And more than that, he reminds us that we too are His champions; we too are given light (Matthew 5:14-16).

It is easy to live like Saul’s trip to Damascus was just a nice story. I consider how few times I have prayed for individuals, candidates, neighbors I like—much less those I find myself in conflict with—I wonder, “Do I really believe God changed Saul or can change me? Do I really believe that Christ was light at the beginning, that light humbled Saul, and that light was entrusted to him and to me?” Do I really believe 22 verses: a flash of light, a question, and a second chance, the world forever changed (Acts 9:1-22).

This change does not come easy. We need only look to the Apostles themselves to see that, even full of the Spirit, they still faced disagreements, still had to confront each other’s humanness. I can’t imagine what it would be like to have to listen to Saul—because I can’t bring myself to call him Paul—as he tells me how I should live when I know he gave the blessing for my cousin to be murdered.

As a black man, I imagine it would be similar to hearing a homily on stewardship from a former Neo-Nazi—why should I, have to listen to him. But as the Body of Christ, we are not given a choice in believing in the redemptive power of God’s love or new creations (Ephesians 4:20-24).

I lose sight of the big, world changing—often less tangible, less visible—miracles God has given us. I take for granted Christ calling us the Body (1 Corinthians 12:12); that among all the gifts, miracles, God has entrusted us with, the greatest is love (1 Corinthians 13:1-13). I read love is patient and kind, and imagine how romantic this is to hear recited at engagements or in Nicholas Sparks novels, and I lose sight of its power.

But it is powerful. As a black man that has spent much of his life in parts of the world and country where being a black man is not always a great thing, I have learned to love—and be loved—by those I once thought were my enemies. It is scary, because it does not always “work” predictably. If I only curse someone, I know how that will turn out. But love opens up an entire universe of possibilities that can end in heartbreak, pain, or things more beautiful than we can imagine.

To conclude, a challenge and question to myself and the reader: Who is your “Saul/Paul?”

Pick someone from Facebook, someone delusional, someone hate-filled, someone your dumb neighbor voted for, and pray for them. Don’t pray for their worldview, but pray for them. For their child with cancer, for their dog they have to put down, for their anxiety and depression, for their abusive father, for them to see the light—not as you see it, but as God would have them see it; and then, if we’re feeling really bold: how can we be love and light to them?

(c) Fr Anthony Messeh (2018). WHO IS YOUR SAUL/PAUL? by Bradley. Available at http://www.franthony.com/blog/who-is-your-saulpaul?rq=who%20is%20your%20saul.

That They May Be Saved, Even if I Perish

Adapted from a sermon by Fr Daniel Fanous

Passage: Mark 10:17-31

Perhaps the most famous words in this gospel are the words that Christ teaches. He says, “For with God, nothing will be impossible.” But these words are misplaced, misinterpreted, taken out of context, and then used for everyone to put on the walls. I remember when I was studying for my HSC, my mum put these words all over my desk: with God, all things are possible – as if God’s intent and purpose was for me to get the highest possible mark. People say it when they’re going through tough times: with God, all things are possible. And even though it’s beautiful, the problem is that Christ is speaking those words in a very particular context.

Laying down my life for others – that is impossible. It is possible, perhaps, to lay down your life for friends and family, but for people you don’t know, even enemies, it is impossible. That is the context of Christ saying that with God all things are possible. And it’s really important we understand it like that. This entire gospel is a response to a question – a man who is wealthy comes to our Lord and asks: “what shall I do that I might inherit eternal life?” After Christ tells him the commandments, the man says: “all these things I’ve done since my youth” – I have done everything commanded of me. I’ve obeyed the scriptures. But Christ says there is one thing he lacks – Christ says “take up your cross and follow me”. And it says that he was sad and sorrowful… because he couldn’t lay down his life for others. He couldn’t follow Christ to the cross. All that he was doing was good and righteous. But unless it was tied and directed to that last command, it is fruitless.

Christ says to take up your cross and follow Him. Follow him there to lay down His life for others, for us. And unless I have that feeling in my heart that my life is worthless in comparison to those around me, and I am willing to lay it down for others, everything else I do has no purpose, and no fruit. It’s as St Paul says: even if we give our bodies to be burnt, martyred, and I don’t have love, it is fruitless. It us useless. It is senseless noise, like a clanging cymbal, making noise with no direction. (1 Corinthians 13:1). Christ said to us: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you.” (John 13:34)

There’s nothing new in the commandment to love one another. This was taught in the Old Testament. The difference here is to “love one another; as I have loved you”, by laying down my life for you. Even those who I don’t know, who aren’t family or friends, for those who abuse me – I lay down my life for them.

So when Christ says that with God things all things are possible, He means to love and lay down ones life. There’s a remarkable story of the desert fathers in the fourth century, about St Anthony the Great (who was called this not only because he was one of the first, but because he was considered the greatest one). When monks and other people would see him, they’d all go silent, and say that the great one was among them – someone who was transfigured with the light of Christ. When people would see him, the monks would see him they would all go silent. And they would say the great one is among them, someone that was transfigured with the light of Christ. St Anthony therefore prayed to God and said, “Lord, I love you to such a degree that I cannot imagine that anyone would love you as much as I do.”

God then directed St Anthony to a certain cobbler living in Alexandria. St Anthony left the desert to find this cobbler and asks: are you the one the Lord showed me when I prayed asking if anyone loved the Lord more than I did? I expected a monk, an ascetic, a hermit, but he showed me a cobbler. What is it that you do?” The man then explained that there was nothing he did particularly: he gave a third of his income to the church, a third to the poor, and a third he kept. St Anthony looked at him and laughed. This man had sacrificed some, St Anthony had sacrificed everything to go live in poverty in the desert. Surely there was more to it. So he asked the cobbler again: “what do you do in your heart?”

The man responded with these words: “I do nothing special. Only as I work, I look at those who pass by me and and pray that they may be saved and that only I will perish.” That was it. Not a feeling or emotional reaction or empty words. They were the prayers of his heart each and every day. Let these pagans who don’t know God be saved, and let me perish.

Jesus says: “One thing you lack: take up your cross and follow me.” He says: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another as I have loved you.”

For the cobbler, that lead his heart in one direction, to pray that everyone around him would be saved, even if that would mean that he would perish. It was that which made him greater than St Anthony, the greatest ascetic who gave up everything to live in the middle of the desert, in celibacy, in poverty, in obedience and in daily struggle. Because his heart became like Christ’s heart, aching with the love that Christ’s heart aches with for those around us, that he was ready to lay down his life for those he didn’t even know.

This is not something foreign to us. Moses prays when the Lord was about to destroy his people (Exodus 32). He says: “Yet now, if You will forgive their sin—but if not, I pray, blot me out of Your book which You have written.” (verse 32) He begs the Lord to blot out the sins of the people around him, and if not, to take his name out of the Book of Life.

St Paul writes to the Romans: “For I could wish that I myself were accursed from Christ for my brethren, my countrymen according to the flesh” (Romans 9:3). St Paul’s whole life was for Christ, but even then, he was willing to be cursed and separated from Christ for his brethren to be saved. Their hearts, like the hearts of the cobbler, ached with the love of Christ for everyone, even the haters, the abusers and the spiteful. This is what Christ meant when He said that with God all things are possible.

Metropolitan Anthony Bloom, who was a an incredible Russian Bishop in England, some years ago once told this story: after World War Two, in the Jewish concentration camps, a piece of paper was found. It had a man’s last words, before seeing his friends and family die and dying himself, which said:

Lord, when you come to this earth to judge, do not condemn the people that have done these atrocities to us. Do not hold against them the cruelty of our suffering and the violence in our despair. But look at the fruits which we have borne: patience, humility, fortitude, forgiveness, loyalty, solidarity. May these fruits be accounted in their salvation.

He doesn’t asked the Lord to remember how they harmed and killed and murdered for no reason but their ethnicity. He says, look at our fruits and account that to them. It’s a remarkable attitude. I don’t know who wrote that piece of paper, whether they were a Jew or not, but it was someone regardless in whom Christ dwelt, because this is the heart of Christ – that He lays down his life for all. He says like the cobbler: “that they may be saved, let me perish”. He says like Moses: “if you can’t save them, blot me out from the Book of Life.” He says like Paul: “let me be accursed from Christ if only my countrymen would come to know Him”.

Jesus says: “One thing you lack: take up your cross and follow me.” He says: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another as I have loved you.” This feeling must be mine if I follow Christ. I must lay down my life for those around me, even those who pass me by and my enemies. This is the thing that weighs my heart. If I care only for my family, only for my friends, only for my own, in my heart is not Christ’s heart.

So let us turn to Him in our hearts that we may feel His love for the world. That is the centre of prayers in our religion, the centre of the Eucharist in the Orthodox Church. During the institution in the mass, we say: “He instituted for us this great mystery of godliness – the Eucharist – being determined to give Himself up to death for the life of the world.” May we give ourselves to the life of the world. Glory be to God forever, Amen.

Listen to the sermon here!

Who Is My Enemy?

By Monica

Originally seen on Becoming Fully Alive blog site, 26 Nov 2015.

I believe in a common humanity. Practically, that means that we are not individuals, but persons who are in relationship with each other. Most importantly, it means that there is a common thread that is stitched through the bone and sinew of us all; a knot anywhere, affects us all. As Martin Luther King once said,“We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly.”

Beyond race, culture and religion, we are all made in the image and likeness of God. We all possess frail hearts, we all desire to love and be loved. We all long to find safety and belonging in the world. We all hurt and we fear, we stumble into awkward moments, into our own chaos and anger. We are the same beneath these beautiful layers of skin and confusion. We are all the same kind of broken. And in our broken, common humanity, redemption desires to tell the tale of us all, because there is no one beyond grace.

Yet how many people have we deemed unworthy of grace? How many souls have we too easily condemned?

“Enemy” is a strong word. Strong enough to make us distance ourselves from it and deny that it plays a part in our lives. But when Christ spoke of enemies, he spoke simply; an enemy is someone who stands in the way of our freedom, dignity, our capacity to grow and love, someone who attacks us or our country. An enemy most commonly exists within the person whom we are avoiding.

When the lawyer spoke to Jesus asking how he was to enter the kingdom of heaven, He answered him simply; “love your neighbour as yourself.” But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbour?” (Luke 10:29). Though the words of the Bible are clear and simple, just like the lawyer, we seek justification. Love my enemy? Who is my enemy? Surely Jesus didn’t mean ISIS, surely He didn’t mean the human responsible for my deepest hurts?

But what if the ones we name offenders can be freed to love?

‘They are people who, if loved, helped, and trusted, can in some small way recognize their faults and their brokenness and can grow in humanity and in inner freedom.” -Jean Vanier

What if humanity rose up to forgive? Like the sacred hearts of Katja Rosenberg, Antoine Leiris and Arturo Martinez. What if we extended forgiveness regardless of our hurts and our rights, and followed the sacred Word that brings all healing? For us to forgive, we must yearn for unity and peace, yearn for the oneness to be united in mind, in heart and in spirit. If we love and desire for all to be free to bear fruit, we will be a people heavy for forgiveness. We will live full and whole that we are no longer driven by our desire to be filled and prove ourselves worthy but we will yearn for the growth of all people in peace and in unity. To be a peacemaker, we must make peace with ourselves and we must make peace with those around us. We must believe that we are all a part of the suffering. We have all hurt and been hurt. When we point out darkness, we must remember to point back at our own souls. It is not easy to see beyond our own suffering, sometimes it is blinding. It is not easy to accept forgiveness or to forgive; it is a struggle.

‘ When we dare to care, then we discover that nothing human is foreign to us, but that all the hatred and love, cruelty and compassion, fear and joy can be found in our own hearts. When we dare to care, we have to confess that when others kill, I could have killed too. When others torture, I could have done the same. When others heal, I could have healed too.’ -Henri Nouwen

The truth is our enemies can often tell us a lot more about us than our friends can. The way we respond to our enemies will tell us the true state of our hearts; if we are hearts walking in forgiveness or if we walk in resentment.

Prayer for my Enemies

“Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even I bless and do not curse them. They, rather than I, have confessed my sins before the world. They have punished me, whenever I have hesitated to punish myself. They have tormented me, whenever I have tried to flee torments. They have scolded me, whenever I have flattered myself. They have spat upon me, whenever I have filled myself with arrogance. Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even I bless them and do not curse them. Whenever I have made myself wise, they have called me foolish. Whenever I have made myself mighty, they have mocked me as though I were a fly. Whenever I have wanted to lead people, they have shoved me into the background. Whenever I have rushed to enrich myself, they have prevented me with an iron hand. Whenever I thought that I would sleep peacefully, they have wakened me from sleep. Whenever I have tried to build a home for a long and tranquil life, they have demolished it and driven me out. Truly, enemies have cut me loose from the world and have stretched out my hands to the hem of your garment. Bless my enemies, O Lord.

Even I bless them and do not curse them. Bless them and multiply them; multiply them and make them even more bitterly against me: So that my fleeing will have no return; So that all my hope in men may be scattered like cobwebs; So that absolute serenity may begin to reign in my soul; So that my heart may become the grave of my two evil twins: arrogance and anger; So that I might amass all my treasure in heaven; Ah, so that I may for once be freed from self-deception, which has entangled me in the dreadful web of illusory life. Enemies have taught me to know what hardly anyone knows, that a person has no enemies in the world except himself.

One hates his enemies only when he fails to realise that they are not enemies, but cruel friends. It is truly difficult for me to say who has done me more good and who has done me more evil in the world: friends or enemies. Therefore bless, O Lord, both my friends and my enemies. A slave curses enemies, for he does not understand. But a son blesses them, for he understands. For a son knows that his enemies cannot touch his life. Therefore he freely steps among them and prays to God for them. Bless my enemies, O Lord. Even I bless them and do not curse them.”

–Bishop Nikolai Velimirovic

Original blog post available at- https://becomingfullyalive.com/who-is-my-enemy/

FOR ME, TO LIVE IS CHRIST

April 20, 2018

Originally seen on Fr Anthony’s blog (20 April. 2020),

This is a guest post from Marco Attia, an Orthodox Christian blogger from Melbourne, Australia whose goal in writing is to “inspire you to live a life of faith, purpose and spiritual growth”. You can read more of Marco’s work on his blog, Spiritually Grounded, or by following him on Twitter or Facebook. If you too are interested in guest posting on my blog, please visit my Guest Post guidelines for more info.

(c) Fr Anthony Messeh (2018). For Me, to Live is Christ. Available at http://www.franthony.com/blog/for-me-to-live-is-christ.

We’ve all heard St Paul’s famous words in Philippians 1:21 in which he boldly declares: “For me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain.”

Powerful words aren’t they!? But have you ever stopped to think about the implications of such words? After all this isn’t just catchy slogan found on printed mugs and tees for the hipster Christian to wear loud and proud – are they? Certainly not!

These powerful words could have a huge impact on our lives, and have the potential to turn the world upside down if we are to take them more seriously.

LIFE IS CHRIST

What’s interesting is that Paul did not write these words in an attempt to be an eloquent writer, nor was he anticipating his message to make the final cut of the New Testament. Rather he meant every word he penned because his letter to the Philippians was written as he was awaiting his imminent fate… death. More so, Paul wrote to the Philippian community to strengthen them through their own struggles and persecution. So for Paul dying was imminent and likely, and would finally unite him with His beloved Lord, but if he were to go on living, then his Life is grounded in Christ. Either way, Paul’s life is Christ’s.

GROUNDED IN CHRIST

But what does being grounded in Christ look like? The answer to that is apparent when we look at Christ’s earthly ministry. When we examine how Christ lived His life, we quickly come to realize that St Paul is referring to Christ’s love. The Lord taught in love, lived in love, rebuked in love and ultimately died in love. Ultimately, through His incarnation, Christ showed us who God is…And God is LOVE!

Christ did all this, in love, for you and I!

IT’S ALL ABOUT LOVE

The fundamentals of the faith and of all Orthodox theology can be summed up in only three words… God is LOVE. The Gospel is a message of Love. The Holy Trinity is a communion of love between three persons of one divine essence. And because man is created in the image and likeness of God, we are created to share and live in love. It is therefore love that makes us Christ-like, the more I love, the more I imitate the Lord who is Love.

LOVE IN ACTION

Unfortunately, today’s society has greatly skewed our understanding of love. We have been led to believe that love is that warm fuzzy feeling you get when you meet that nice girl on the train, or the sensation you feel upon receiving your brand new iPhone X. But this is far from the truth, this is not love!

Love is an action not an emotion. Paul shows us precisely what love is by personifying it for us in 1 Corinthians 13. If love were a person, they would be characterized by the following traits.

In a nutshell, love gives of itself! Love is sacrificial. So much so that the Lord Himself testifies that ‘Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends’ – John 15:13. And this is precisely what Christ did for us, His love was ultimately manifested by his sacrifice on the Cross.

SACRIFICE IS THE LANGUAGE OF LOVE

So we too in order to manifest our love for God and for others must learn to speak the language of love – sacrifice! And this is no easy feat. Love is challenging because it requires that we put to death something that means so much to us…our ego.

This idea has become so foreign to us due to the influence of the secular society in which we live. We live in a self-absorbed culture, where we are told to ‘look out for number 1’, and phrases such as ‘self-image’, ‘self-esteem’, and ‘self-respect’ show just how ‘self-ish’ we are becoming.

We have become the ‘selfie’ generation, and that makes it hard to look beyond ourselves. Whilst there is nothing inherently wrong with looking out for ourselves, there are countless opportunities to experience love that is out of this world when we lay down our ego for God and for others.

It is precisely the giving of ourselves that leads us to experience the insurmountable joy that St Paul alludes to when he affirms: ‘Yes, and if I am being poured out as a drink offering on the sacrifice and service of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with you all. For the same reason you also be glad and rejoice…’ – Philippians 2:17-18.

Do you want to be glad and rejoice? You can do so through your good works and acts of kindness towards others. And through the sacrifices you make for the sake of God and those around you. You can truly light up the world by living for others, and that’s what it means to live for Christ.

When God Doesn’t Answer

When God Doesn’t Answer

“I say to you, though he will not rise and give to him because he is his friend, yet because of his persistence he will rise and give him as many as he needs.” (Luke 11:8)

So if Jesus said that if I keep asking for what I want, He will give it to me? If God hasn’t given me what I asked for, I just need to knock a little harder, do a couple more metanias and then He’ll give me what I want... right?

By misunderstanding of this parable, we take our desires and demand them to be heard. We beg God to give us that one blessing, that one job, that one career, that one boy/girl that will make us the happiest person in the world.

If we can Biblically justify our demands, then that makes them right, doesn’t it? There is much more to it that we all too willingly forget. The path to God is simple, yet we overcomplicate it when we twist God’s will with our own.

Oftentimes, our persistence in prayer is focused on our requests. But to persist in prayer is to persist in thanksgiving, to persist in repentance, to persist to know Him, to persist in making Him the love of my life. Our contentment is found in things above, and not in the distractions of this world. It would be quite unlike God to give us ONLY what we pray for.

Our God is sufficient for every need, and if we persist, He will be everything we want, too. Whatever matters to us, matters to Him. God plants desires in all our hearts so that He can make His Love manifest in our lives. The desires themselves may seem like the goal, but each request can serve as a stepping stone to a life in Christ. In petitioning, we may confuse Christ as the means to reach the request. Persisting, in the answered and unanswered, will see Christ become the end goal, and each request a stepping stone toward Him, and this will always be more than enough.

He says, ask that your joy may be full. Don’t ask for the temporal. Ask for the eternal that never fades. Come boldly before the throne of grace. Why ask for things that don’t matter in the grand scheme of things? We persist for the eternal over the temporal. There may be nothing wrong with what you have asked for, but there’s more He wants to give you.

Every prayer at the point of desperation becomes the source of contentment to the soul in need. Hold tight; the best is yet to come. When we persist in prayer, we stop breaking His door down for what we want in this world, and start searching until we understand the depths of His love, and if that is the goal, whenever we think we know Him, He outdoes Him, time and time again, for His love is boundless. When He tells us to persist in prayer, we persist because we will forever be searching deeper to know His love. Our requests will come and go, but His Love remains.

Often when you’ve been praying for something for so long and God doesn’t
give it to you, this can make prayers dry; it can make prayers fade away. If we persist for the eternal – the imperishable – then we can never be disappointed.

The path to the Kingdom is through a life of thanksgiving, in thanksgiving there are no desires above the One that provides all. Start every prayer in thanksgiving. As for problems, the best kind are the ones that seem completely hopeless. The ones where you feel you have nowhere to turn. The ones that leave you broken-hearted. For it is the broken-hearted whom the Lord heals. It is the poor in spirit that see God. If God is naturally drawn to us in our state of exhaustion and depletion, how much more will He reveal Himself to those that continue to pray while in that state?

May we never allow worldly cares to stop us from true prayer and communion with Christ and all orders of heavenly hosts. Glory be to God forever Amen.

Sunday Police

Sunday Police

By Dalia Fam

Originally seen on Fr Abraham and Dalia Fam’s blog goCoptic, 7 Feb, 2019.

As I was sitting one Sunday in church, a young girl who does not come much came and sat beside me. The first thing I noticed was that she was wearing a very inappropriate top and revealing way too much. So, I did what any “loving” mother of the church would do. I took a very long head covering, gently draping it over her shoulders, to cover the top of her body.

Some of you would agree with my actions. I mean after all my young son was beside me! She is a stumbling block to the other boys here! I am protecting others. Others will be distracted. I am teaching other young girls watching how to dress in church. I am teaching her how to respect the church. Love is shown through correction, as I correct my own children. I would have corrected my daughter if she came like this to church. Aren’t I treating her like I would my own daughter?

But, some select few of you, would see the hypocrisy of my actions. I may be covered up in clothing but my heart is full of judgment and pride. The outside of the cup is clean for me and I wear it proudly, religiously. Because I know how to dress in church, I look better than her. Because I come to church every Sunday, I know better than her. Because I am a servant or leader in the church, I am better than her.

Did I show her love or condemnation by covering her?

Instead of covering her with a loving hug, I covered her with disgrace and judgment. Rather than love her, I put her to shame. I humiliated her.

Instead of welcoming her to church, which she hadn’t come to in a long time, I pushed her back out the door emotionally and maybe even physically as well.

If we have grown up in the church, we have seen the fixation we have on correction. We are fixated with how people sit. Not crossing legs or not. Did I step into the altar with my right foot or not? Did I cover my hair? And many more examples.

I value that our churches have taught us how to respect the church. How to be disciplined and take the church serious. But have we forgotten about acceptance and love? I know I have.

One of the characteristics of our motto, “Every Church is a Mission Church,” is that a church openly welcomes and loves everyone, without discrimination. If we want to fulfill our calling that we are all called to be missionaries, then we have to practice this love and acceptance of others.

Yes, we should have respect in our churches. But what if we look at things backwards. What if I show love to someone and through that love, the person will eventually want to respect the presence of God? Seeing things backwards takes a much longer time to see change. But that is what Mission teaches us – there is no overnight, quick fix to mission. Correction will get a much faster solution. But correction without first loving and having a relationship is merely judgment. And most of the time, we spend our time correcting this way.

Once, I was at a church for a wedding of close friends of ours. We went the day before to help set up the church for the wedding. There was a youth boy there who lived right next door to the church and we heard rarely comes. He spent the entire day voluntarily mowing the lawn, preparing for this wedding for this family friend of theirs. As he walked into the church to greet a visiting priest, a visiting servant quickly scolded him not to enter the church because he was wearing shorts. The boy’s face is a face I will never forget as he turned to walk out the door.

I am not here to pass judgment on our servants or leaders. But, we have all seen or felt the stab of judgment and the criticism of correction without love. There are very few instances where we can share an example of someone building us up with total acceptance and love. And why I remember this story from years ago is because I have been guilty too.

I have hurt numerous people with my judgment. With my fixation on others to follow the rules before I have showered them with love. By being a Sunday police.

We have both seen the good and the bad in our churches. Let us see more of the good. Let us DO more of the good. Let us make a movement to shower others with love.

Let’s not focus on correction. Correction will come. But focus on love!!

The church is full of protectors of the rules but who will rise up and be a protector of love? The Love of Jesus.

What can I and others do to change this?

These are small ways we can teach ourselves and our children on how to openly accept everyone who walks into the door of our churches. Then, we live out this motto: Every Church is a Mission Church.

Remember our Calling

I love this verse from Ephesians 4:1-4:

I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called, with all lowliness and gentleness, with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love, endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called in one hope of your calling.

We are all called to live out this way. These are powerful verses challenging us on how to live out our calling to be missionaries. Through gentleness, loving humility, and perseverance when it gets hard or challenging. But above all, keep the unity of the Spirit because we are one body. Keeping the unity requires me to love unconditionally and accept without bounds.

Change your Perception

Instead of giving the people sitting next to me talking in church, a dirty look because they are “distracting” me; say, I am happy that these two people have found fellowship here at church instead of somewhere else.

When someone comes and not dressed appropriate; say I am glad she still decided to come when she could have chosen a hundred other places to go.

Instead of making the mother of a small, noisy child feel bad with a mean look, offer a helping hand.

If someone has not come in a while, sit beside them, then make them a cup of coffee after church.

Others will see your example and follow.

Loveable Self-Image

Loveable Self-Image

By Lilyan Andrews

Originally seen on Lilyan Andrews’ blog Lilies and Thorns, September 19, 2020.

Self-Image Definition: the way you think about yourself and your abilities or appearance.

The topic of self-image is a near and dear one to my heart. I’ve previously mentioned it in an earlier post about confidence, and as I promised in that post, here is more about it.

I recently asked people on my Instagram how they view their self-image, and here are some of the responses I got:

Not as I would like myself to be
As someone who has failed in life
A very broken work in progress
Too chubby not so smart

Do any of these sound familiar? We are always our own worst critic; quickly pointing out our flaws and failing to see how great we are. So how do we get out of that negative mentality?

The secret is to focus on the positives, and rewire how you look at the negatives. You also have to figure where these negative thoughts are coming from and how to overcome them.

So I am going to start out with giving you a little homework assignment. I want you to take a long look in the mirror and write down three things that you see that you love about yourself. The next day add more to that list, and the following day do the same thing, and keep going. If you hit a roadblock just ask your close friends or family what they like about you, and I bet their list is probably longer than yours.

Since this topic is about self-image, I’m talking about writing down physical attributes. Yes, your personality is wonderful too, but I hope you already know that (if you don’t, check out the other posts in this series). So if you love your hair, arms, eyes, smile or anything else, write that down, because too often when we look in the mirror the first things that jump out at us are our “flaws.” For example, if you don’t like your legs, that’s the first place your eyes will go when you look in the mirror. And here is an even bigger challenge. Ask yourself, “Why don’t I like my ______?” (you fill in the blank).

Is it because I see other girls that look better and it makes me feel less-than? Is it because I’ve been bullied to believe I am not beautiful enough or thin enough? Is it because I was told to dress a certain way to hide my femininity? Let’s explore these thoughts together.

Our self-image really takes a big hit when we compare ourselves to others. In the world of social media we can be bombarded with thousands of people who are picture-perfect. Please do yourself a huge favor and ignore the Instagram models. Do you know how long it takes them to look like that? I’d argue it takes a few hours to do full hair and makeup and pose for a hundred pictures until they get the perfect one. Not to mention the photo editing that follows. Trust me, the whole “woke up like this” thing is a myth. So if you find yourself feeling down after looking at those posts, it’s totally okay (and highly recommended) to unfollow them. You have full control over what fills your newsfeed. I suggest following people with a similar body type, who you can tell from the way they dress have similar values to you. That means their page isn’t full of bikini pictures and provocative poses.

Ladies, don’t let your self-worth be defined by the likes and how many fire emojis you get in the comments. Don’t you dare give people that much power over your self-confidence. Stop giving people on the internet or in real life any power over how you feel!

If you give an ear to people’s negative comments then you start believing their hurtful judgement. This is where you have to take things in one ear and out the other, which is easier said than done. Bullies exist and unfortunately sometimes they are unavoidable. They could be your classmates, or sadly even your family members. I write this with a heavy heart because I know it’s sometimes our own parents that are constantly putting us down about things like our weight. To that I say, if you are doing your best to be healthy and take care of your body then forget whatever anyone else says! But if you’re not, then what’s stopping you from taking care of your body like the temple it truly is?

“Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.”
1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Our community sometimes doesn’t know how to properly teach us to love our bodies. The main message you might have heard growing up is to be modest and cover up. While there is a truth to that, this message might have been delivered and also taken the wrong way by some. I do believe that no one should be flaunting cleavage or wearing super tight clothing that shows just about everything. However, I don’t ever want you to believe that there is something wrong with your body or your curves that you need to go to extremes to hide them. Embrace your femininity in a healthy and God-fearing way.

I knew a girl in high school that would always tie sweaters around her waist to cover her backside. She was a little blessed in that area, and was so self-conscious about it that she felt the need to always hide it. She didn’t realize that God made her that way on purpose and that there was absolutely nothing wrong with being comfortable in her own skin. It’s not her fault that popular culture sometimes over-sexualizes a woman’s figure, and she was trying to be mindful not to draw the wrong kind of attention to herself.

Girls, God created Eve with all that beauty for a reason, and He doesn’t make mistakes. After all, we were created in His image. “So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.” (Genesis 1:27). You are the Lord’s handiwork, and to judge your appearance as anything less than beautiful is to deem God’s work as inadequate.

I totally believe in the idea of “look good, feel good, do good.” I’m all about healthy self-care. It’s totally fine to spend time on your hair, your outfit or your makeup if you choose, as long as your self-worth isn’t based on that. Because we all have bad hair days, and our self-love should not disappear on those days. Love yourself and be confident in yourself no matter what your outside appearance looks like. As long as you are following St. Peter’s advice in 1 Peter 3: 3-4 then you’re good. “Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel—rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”

Candace Cameron Bure does a great job talking about this point in chapter five of her book “Kind is the New Classy.” She focuses on practicing healthy self-care and knowing that what’s on the inside is more important than what’s on the outside.

On that instagram question I mentioned in the beginning, I also got some good answers. Some people wrote:

His daughter
Beautiful
Priceless; my “price tag” is the blood of Christ
Resilient and confident… wasn’t always like this actually

These are the kind of answers I want you to have when you think about your self-image. Confidence doesn’t just show up overnight, it is something you work on, struggle with and conquer by the grace of God. And if you ever need any encouragement, I’m always a message away!

(c) Lilyan Andrews (2020). Loveable Self-Image by Lilyan Andrews. Available at: https://www.liliesandthorns.com/post/lovable-self-image

Cracked Hearts and Open Arms

Cracked Hearts and Open Arms

By Bethany Kaldas

‘But love your enemies, do good, and lend, hoping for nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High. For He is kind to the unthankful and evil. Therefore be merciful, just as your Father also is merciful.’
Luke 6:35-36

One of the hardest things in life is to love and not be loved in return—or perhaps even worse, to love and be mistreated in return. I’m not mainly speaking in a romantic sense (in fact, to take this in a romantic sense may be quite unwise)—this goes far deeper than that. A parent who does everything he can to show love to his child and yet gets nothing but angst and rebellion and spite in return goes through just as much, if not more, agony as the unrequited lover. A servant may feel the darkest despair when she pours her whole heart and soul out to reach the young girl who is straying from Christ, only to have the girl fight back like she’s the enemy. You may do everything you can to hold on to a dear friend, but sometimes they still walk away.

I’ve heard it said occasionally, within the Church, that it is better to guard your heart against the world, not to love anyone or anything too much, because nothing here lasts. There is some truth to that—though, perhaps, not the way it first seems. But you can see why the idea seems to make sense, right? People quarrel, they leave, they change from being caring to being cold, they can turn against you on the slightest provocation. Even if none of this happens, everyone dies eventually. Even pets, even places, even inanimate objects are unlikely to outlast your affections. You’ll be burned in the end.

The truth is, no matter how much effort you put into a relationship—of any kind—and even if you do everything right, there is no such thing as a safe love. There is a way in which pain and love are inseparable. You must have open arms to love, and it is when your arms are open that you are at your most vulnerable.

So why go through with it? If open arms mean broken hearts, then wouldn’t it be better to always keep your guards up? Why would you ever let anyone in? Who could possibly be worth it?

‘There is no safe investment. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket – safe, dark, motionless, airless – it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.’
C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

If you live in constant fear of death, you will never live at all. If you only love when you are certain your heart will not be wounded, you will never love at all. Love of any kind is the inevitable risk of being broken apart.

‘Most assuredly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces muchgrain.’
John 12:24

A grain doesn’t just need to be buried to live—it also needs to be cracked open. You can’t walk out of a tomb before the stone has been rolled away, no matter how exhausting and painful that process is, no matter how much the sunlight burns your eyes. And it will burn. Love is a leap. Love is a risk.

‘The leap of faith always means loving without expecting to be loved in return, giving without wanting to receive, inviting without hoping to be invited, holding without asking to be held. And every time I make a little leap, I catch a glimpse of the One who runs out to me and invites me into his joy, the joy in which I can find not only myself, but also my brothers and sisters. Thus the disciplines of trust and gratitude reveal the God who searches for me, burning with desire to take away all my resentments and complaints and to let me sit at his side at the heavenly banquet.’
Henri J.M. Nouwen, Return of the Prodigal Son

Love is not safe. Your heart will be broken. But there is One who broke His heart for you first. A Love that shone so bright, not from the safety of a throne as you know it, but hung in agony from a cross, pierced by nails and thorns. His heart broke so that all the cracks in yours, so small by comparison, can shine with the light of His.

Love’s as hard as nails,
Love is nails:
Blunt, thick, hammered through
The medial nerves of One Who, having made us,
Knew The thing He had done,
Seeing what all that is
Our cross, and His
C. S. Lewis, Love’s Warm as Tears

Believe it or not (and people are very unlikely to ever say this to you out loud in actual words) but everyone—even the most stubborn, arrogant, irritating people you know—has a cracked heart. Everyone wants to be loved, even if they don’t always act like they care. Love is never wasted, but they may sting you. When they see the cracks in your heart they might strike. After all, that is what we did to Him.

When you open your heart, when you love knowing it might break you, that is when you see Him. That is when you become like Him. He died, not that you might remain safe in the tomb, but that you might meet Him beyond it. There’s no light in that tomb, no breath, no life. Life awaits you beyond the walls you’ve put around your heart. He awaits you still. For all the cracks you’ve put in His heart, all the nails in His hands, still He awaits you with arms open.

God has given you a heart, and although cracks run through it, however deep, however wide, He has filled it with His love. Let that love shine through the fractures in your own heart to theirs. Show them what it means to be loved regardless. He’s shown you that you’re worth it—take that risk. Show them they are too.

‘We love Him because He first loved us.’
1 John 4:19

The Silent Spiritual Killer

The Silent Spiritual Killer

Adapted from a sermon by Dr Adel Magdy

Passage Luke 7:28-35

In our lives, there are some sins that are very obvious. You fall into sin, and the manifestation is there immediately; murder, adultery, theft – the consequences are visible and immediate. We know instantly that we have sinned.

There are other sins in our lives that aren’t as obvious. They subtly creep into our lives, and eventually destroy us. These are the sins that are particularly dangerous because there are no warning signs.

In the field of medicine, there are some diseases that are known as, “silent killers,” for this very reason. They do not display symptoms until it is too late and the disease has completely ravaged the body.

The same applies to silent spiritual killers. They creep in slowly until its too late, because there are no pre-symptoms. The silent spiritual killer that we will focus on is the sin of judging others negatively and finding faults of others. This eventually consumes all our thoughts and feelings until we are drowning in sin.

The Lord highlights an upsetting passage and describes the Pharisees as such. They constantly degrade and judge those around them. Christ says,

‘We played the flute for you, And you did not dance; We mourned to you, And you did not weep. For John the Baptist came neither eating bread nor drinking wine, and you say, ‘He has a demon.’ The Son of Man has come eating and drinking, and you say, ‘Look, a glutton and a winebibber, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!’
Luke 7:32-34

No matter the circumstance, the Pharisees found a way to be judgemental. In the happy times, they were not happy. In sad times, they were not sad. When they saw someone fasting, praying, living a righteous life, instead of thinking thoughts of praise, they criticised and accused John the Baptist of being demon-possessed. When the Lord wanted to show them that He was One of us, immediately they criticised Him for being a Friend of drunkards and sinners.

This is a problem in all our lives, to some degree. Having a negative attitude, even silently in our hearts, can lead to our destruction.

I can typically tell when it is time for me to confess when I find myself critical toward others, or I look toward a situation and judge. Instantly, this is a reminder to confess and start fresh. The Lord lifts the scales from my eyes and I am renewed to an attitude that can make excuses for others.

If you consider someone in your life that is always negative and critical, it is exhausting to be around them. You can never please them. On a nice sunny day, they will complain of the heat. The next day is cold, and they complain that it’s too cold to even go outside. In the process of being critical, they destroy themselves spiritually.

The Lord is calling us to start fresh, and to look to others in a new light. To stop being critical and start trying to look through the eyes of the Lord. Today we can all promise the Lord to give the benefit of the doubt to those around us. When someone does something that I perceive as wrong, I make excuses for them. I stop judging them in my heart. Instead of being like the critical Pharisees, today I’ll start fresh. I’ll stop judging them.

When we look through the eyes of the Lord and we take away the hardness of our heart, we can no longer be critical of others. When we see people in the gentleness of the Lord, we grow in compassion for those around us.

How many times in the gospel did the Lord see a sinner? How many times did He condemn a sinner? Almost never. How many times did the Lord see the sinner and make an excuse, and not only that, but praise the goodness within them? He would take the one good thing and make them feel like they were the most special person on earth.

This is the message that we can take. That it is not our place to be critical of others, to be critical of the hierarchy, to be critical of my brothers and sisters. It is my place to be like Christ. To look at people with the same gentle and compassionate eyes of the Lord. To remember that when the Lord looks at my sins He doesn’t criticise me, so when I look at others I shouldn’t criticise them.

In Luke 5 we read the miracles of the leper who fell on his face before the Lord and implored Him saying, “Lord, if You are willing, You can make me clean.” This is a beautiful expression, that shows a multitude of virtues in the leper. He comes to the Lord and complete humility and acknowledgement of His power. There is something more subtle that we see, and that is, the Lord makes a point of touching the leper.

There are so many instances that the Lord heals with His words alone. There was no reason why the Lord needed to touch to heal. To understand the significance of the touch, we need to understand what it meant to be a leper. Leprosy, in those times, meant death. As the leprosy rotted the body, the smell became tremendous and meant that their social network was taken away. A leper was deemed unclean and could no associate with their own family. They had to live your life away from people, they had to wear a bell so people knew they were coming and could move out of their way. More still, they had to yell, “unclean” so people would run in the opposite direction.

In the midst of this, he cries out to the Lord, if You are willing, You can make me clean. The Lord would be expected to run away from the leprous man. For the very first, someone has taken a step toward him, instead of away from him. Instead of people throwing things in his direction, someone has drawn near to touch him, despite his leprosy.

This was a touch of, “I do not judge you, I do not criticise you, I love you.”

Instead of looking at people and seeing them as bad people, people that you’d rather run in the opposite direction of, I can make excuses from them. For the one that gives me a hard time, I promise that I will pray for them, instead of attempting revenge. I will show them love when I see them, even if it hurts. And I do this, for the sake of the Lord, because it is what I know He would do.