Tag: #pride

Some thoughts on Humility

Some thoughts on Humility

By Fr Antonios Kaldas

Original post By Fr Antonios Kaldas blogsite, 26 Jul 2007

Someone once told me that trying to knock over the sin of pride is like trying to knock over a ball. If you push it over from any direction, it is still standing. I think what that means is that pride is a very resistant sin indeed. So here are a few recent thoughts on the subject…

When we fall into other sins, it should make it easier to overcome the sin of pride. After all, what have I to be proud of when my weakness and disgrace is laid bare before my very eyes? Yet strangely, sometimes we don’t see it that way. Sometimes the pride is so resilient within us that we think something like: “Yeah, sure I messed up, but I’m still better than so-and-so! He messed up much worse than me!” Or perhaps: “Ok, so I made a mistake. I know I’m not absolutely perfect, but I’m still pretty close!” Then of course, there’s the old favourite, Buck Passing: “It wasn’t my fault I messed up – it was him/her/them. They made me do it!”

The Desert Fathers often encourage us to always place our sins before our eyes. This is not meant, I am sure, in the morbid way it is sometimes understood. It is not meant to ‘beat us down’ and make us feel miserable about ourselves. The Desert Fathers actually had a pretty healthy sense of self-esteem that could bear with this burden of sin, but their self-esteem was built on different foundation to most of us. One of my favourite sayings is the Father who described his spiritual battle thus:

Whenever I become proud, I think of my sins and I say to myself, there, what have you to be proud of you awful sinner? And whenever I fall into despair because of my sins, I say to myself, yes, but God still still loves me!

What a beautifully balanced personality! His self-esteem does not come from the kind of things we use for self-esteem, like our abilities or achievements, the kind of job we do, the size of our house, the gadgets we own or comparing ourselves to others. This happy man builds his self esteem on something that he can never lose – the love of God for him. But there is an added benefit to this way of thinking: that is there can be no pride in this self-esteem. Think about it. Can he take any of the credit for being loved by God? God does not love him because he is saintly (God sees all his sins, hidden and manifest), nor will God be impressed by his achievements or talents (where did he get them in the first place?). God doesn’t care about the latest gadget, and He isn’t impressed that you are clever enough to get one. In fact, you can’t impress God no matter how you try. The only reason God will love you is because He is Love. And that makes all the difference.

It isn’t easy, learning to think like this. We find it so much more secure to cling to our little bag of self-admiration, and we constantly seek for new things to boost our ego. It makes us feel better about life; there is no doubt of that. But in the long run, it is fighting a losing battle. A human being and his/her abilities is just too fragile a base to support our self-esteem for long. Sooner or later, we will have to face up to the fact that we are faulty, mixed up and terribly fallible. And when that kind of self-esteem comes crashing down, it’s pretty ugly.

If you think about, it is a pretty wise investment in the future to start working on this now. Better to begin transferring all my self-esteem stocks to the Bank of God, before the Bank of Me comes crashing down to earth.

Original blog found at- http://www.frantonios.org.au/2007/07/26/some-thoughts-on-humility/

A Fox Named Fear

By: Avi Ibrahim

Original post by Becoming Fully Alive blog site

“NOW IT occurred that while the people pressed upon Jesus to hear the message of God, He was standing by the Lake of Gennesaret (Sea of Galilee).
And He saw two boats drawn up by the lake, but the fishermen had gone down from them and were washing their nets.
And getting into one of the boats, [the one] that belonged to Simon (Peter), He requested him to draw away a little from the shore. Then He sat down and continued to teach the crowd [of people] from the boat.
When He had stopped speaking, He said to Simon (Peter), Put out into the deep [water], and lower your nets for a haul.
And Simon (Peter) answered, Master, we toiled all night [exhaustingly] and caught nothing [in our nets]. But on the ground of Your word, I will lower the nets [again].
And when they had done this, they caught a great number of fish; and as their nets were [at the point of] breaking.
They signalled to their partners in the other boat to come and take hold with them. And they came and filled both the boats, so that they began to sink.
But when Simon Peter saw this, he fell down at Jesus’ knees, saying, Depart from me, for I am a sinful man, O Lord.”

Luke 5:1-8

Upon reading this passage, so many thoughts came to mind towards Peter and his state.  I mean, Peter, you just witnessed an incredible miracle. Aren’t you curious? Don’t you want to know the secret behind what this man just did so you can try to repeat it and enjoy early retirement? You allowed Him on your boat before He showed His awesomeness, and now you want Him to depart?

And it kind of hit me. I’m not too far from that reaction when presented with something Holy and Good. There’s a small sense of worry poking its way with its snout into the heart of that moment.

“This really shouldn’t happen to me. He must have entered the wrong boat! Perhaps, He doesn’t fully know the extent of my sins. It’s only a matter of time before I ruin this?”

It initially smells like the incense of humility but it’s quite the opposite. If it succeeds, I find myself getting out of that boat immediately and walking away. And I would walk away missing that moment when Christ calls me by my name and affirms me by telling me “Fear not! I am entrusting you with this.”

I’d fail to realize that the smell of sweet incense was coming from Christ, humbly entering into my boat. It’s fear that lurks in, welcomed openly by pride, that causes me to reject the gift of His presence. I’d think of my own condition. I’d glance at my calloused hands and the dirt in my nails, ignoring His gentle embrace. Consumed with my state, I can never enjoy His warmth and feel the fullness of joy in that moment. I entered my boat broken but I’d leave it broken, hopeless, and alone.

A few verses down from that passage you’ll find how Matthew (Levi) responds to meeting Christ; sinful Matthew makes a great banquet for Christ in his own sinful house and invites all the sinful tax collector friends he can gather (Luke 5:29). Wow!!! It’s not like Matthew was unaware of his state. He was a tax collector, that title was a scarlet letter he wore around. But he entered into the grace of that invite with celebration, looking onto Christ and not his brokenness.

Why let pride welcome it’s pesky friend, fear, so that we remain friendless? Why let that fox steal an opportunity to have a party, celebrating His presence? Why let it steal my Joy?

Later in scripture, Peter will be proven right countless times as to how sinful he is (and some of these moments are very public) but I guess that’s what it takes for him to ask for Christ to draw near to him as opposed to depart.

“Draw near to me, for I am a sinful man O Lord!”

And in the moment that He does draw near, his identity is transformed. “I the sinful” becomes “I the loved”, “I the embraced”, “I the joyous”.

There is a great song by John Mayer that describes a man talking to his love saying “If my past is any sign of your future, you should be warned before I let you inside.” In its essence, it’s saying “I have full confidence in myself messing this up, and I have a proven record in doing so. My fears are preventing me from experiencing the goodness we have to offer.” The song is called “I don’t trust myself with loving you”, and the title is rightly stated but there would be no hope for this man if the song is left as it is. His trust in himself and his sense of value would cause an endless cycle of failure; the relationships he’s failed in would fail to bring in any new ones. Although the person in this song may have every right not to trust in himself, he may have toiled all night on his miserable boat with no reward, he would be foolish not to trust, love, and enjoy the person who comes into his failed state and accepts him.

But aren’t we all foolish sometimes, our pride casts a verdict on ourselves keeping us behind imaginary prison bars when we should really be celebrating our freedom. So let’s put up the party banners and send the invitations! Let’s be more like Matthew!

Original blog found at- http://becomingfullyalive.com/a-fox-named-fear/

The Poor in Spirit

The Beatitudes Series: Part 1

Blessed are the poor in Spirit for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven

by Karin Zaki

The beatitudes. We read them in Matthew 5 and pray them in the 6th hour of the Agpeya, but what do they actually mean to me? How do I become poor in spirit?

Let’s start off by defining the term ‘Beatitude.’ It comes from a Greek word ‘makariotita’ meaning blessedness. St Gregory of Nyssa teaches that,

“beatitude is a possession of all things held to be good, from which nothing is absent that a good desire may want.”

Now let’s explain the setting. In Matthew 5, Jesus is giving a sermon on the mountain presenting the life principles necessary to achieve a perfect Christian life. Rather than starting with a list of ‘do’s and don’ts,’ He begins to attract the people to the righteous way of living by revealing their eternal rewards. St Augustine says,

“As long as we love to see the rewards, we have to continue the struggle to attain them. Let us be kindled in our eager work to obtain them.”

So what does ‘poor in spirit’ actually mean?

Usually the poor have nothing of their own and constantly ask for assistance/aid. They are not ashamed to admit that they receive their simple sources of sustenance as gifts from others. Similarly, the poor in spirit have nothing of their own, God gifts all their talents, family, friends, community and spiritual/earthly wealth. It is when one comes to the realisation that without God, they are nothing. Simply put, it is to be, ‘humble and contrite in heart’ (St John Chrysostom).

We all know that the beginning of all sin is pride, acting according to our own personal will with complete disregard to God’s will, as Timothy says, “lest being puffed up with pride he fall into the same condemnation as the devil.” (1 Tim 3:6)

Logically, the opposite of pride is humility, so why then use the term ‘poor in spirit’ and not ‘humble in spirit?’

St John Chrysostom in his Homily, beautifully explains that the term ‘poor’ means “awestruck, and tremble at the commandments of God,” as Isaiah states in chapter 66 verse 2, “But on this one will I look: On him who is poor and of a contrite spirit, And who trembles at My word.” St John then goes to explain two types of humility; humility according to one’s own measure and humility with all “excess of lowliness.” The perfect example of this is the story of the Pharisee and the tax collector in Luke 18:10-14. Here St Luke pictures a man (the Pharisee) who is pleased with himself for complying by what he thinks are the ‘requirements’ of religion. He is proud of himself and humble in his own eyes only. Sadly, he has falsified what it means to be religious. He has reduced the understanding of a spiritual relationship with God to a mere checklist of external ‘religious’ actions, such as the amount of riches he gives to the temple, as a measure of his piety. On the other hand, the tax collector displays genuine humility and it is this act of “excess of lowliness” that justifies him before God. This second type is that which develops into spiritual poverty.

Unfortunately, the world we live in assumes that everyone can achieve anything by themselves and even portrays God as a gift bearer for one’s good deeds. Contrarily, display of humility be it in individual, communal or corporate situations is seen as a sign of weakness and a hindrance to reaching your maximum potential. In that way, we live in a society that constantly instils self-glorification and a sense of pride in us. It is therefore essential to always give thanks to God “on every occasion, in every condition and for all things,” for thanksgiving is the first step to humility since it is the realisation that all I do/don’t have is from God.

From an engineering perspective, the spirit is like a high-rise building. To reach the heavens, this building will need to be quite high and so would require a very deep and heavy foundation set in stable rock. This foundation is modesty and submission. If this modesty was taken away, despite how high the spiritual building has been built, it will collapse with quite deplorable consequences. This is captured in Proverbs 24:27 where it says, “Prepare your outside work, make it fit for yourself in the field; and afterward build your house.” That is, first you need to prepare your ‘field’ by admitting your sense of pride and with prayer, earnestly working to thank God in all things submitting to His will. It is only when thanksgiving and humility in submission become an instinct to every situation, that your poverty in spirit continues to rise till it attains the kingdom of Heaven.

Glory be to God. Amen

The Pride of Life

The Pride of Life

Adapted from a sermon by Fr Samuel Fanous

Matthew 4:1-11

Today we have a perfect reading for us as we’re in Lent. Jesus was baptised in the Jordan and as soon as He came up out of the Jordan, the Holy Spirit came unto Him and this is immediately when He was led by the Spirit into the temple. If you think about Adam and Eve as the first humans who were tempted by sin in the Garden of Eden, they failed. These temptations are the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life.

From the book of Genesis when Eve was tempted by sin, it says, “When the woman saw that the tree was good for food..” – this is the lust of the flesh, her hunger, “… and that it was pleasant to the eyes” – this is the lust of the eyes, “…and a tree desirable to make one wise” – this is the pride of life “…she took of its fruit and ate. She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate.” (Genesis 3:6)

Eve lusted out of hunger for the fruit. She looked at the fruit that was pleasant to the eye, and this was where the devil said I will make you ruler over everything, I will make you wise and she believed the devil. This was the pride of life. Adam and Eve represent all of humanity. Like us they sinned.

The first temptation is the lust of the flesh. It says the devil came to Jesus and gave him a stone after fasting for 40 days. Can you imagine not eating for 40 days? Eve looked at the stone that the devil gave to her and she saw that the stone was good as fruit. She was hungry and she desired it.

Oregon says the devil tries to convince us that this stone is bread and will nourish us. He tries to convince us that if you are well fed, if you have comfort, if you have sexual fulfilment, if you have everything you want in this world to satisfy your flesh, you will be satisfied. However, to you and to everyone it is just as good as a stone. It cannot satisfy us any more than a stone could satisfy anyone’s hunger.

The “bread” will provide a minute of enjoyment, a minute of satisfaction, but there is no lasting satisfaction with any of the lusts of the flesh. Christ teaches us how to overcome these lusts. He denied His body as soon as He was baptised. The second He was baptised, the battle began, and this is why, for most people, Christianity is too hard. It is too hard to fast, too hard to go to Church, too hard to pray and too hard to love unconditionally. So, most people take the easy way out. They don’t pray, they don’t fast, they don’t love unconditionally, they don’t come to church because it’s easy.

Jesus says that the easy way out will never satisfy you. What’s His response to the devil? He says “man shall not live by bread alone.” Our satisfaction will not come from bread but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.

The second temptation is the pride of life. That pride where in your heart you want to be like God, you want to have His authority. You think “I am my own God.” Satan convinced Eve that God didn’t want her to eat the fruit because if she did, she will have His power. Eve thought that was a pretty good deal. I eat this fruit and I become like God.

This is the pride where she wanted to become better than what she was created to be. Most of us want this in our lives. We want to live, ruling our own life and making our own decisions. How many of us live as if we are God, at least to ourselves and probably to those around us?

Everything in this world, everyone in this world exists for me. For what I want, for my comfort, my satisfaction and my achievement in life. It is very difficult to realise that you are proud until you have been humiliated.

When I’m humbled, when I’m embarrassed, when I’m disrespected, what happens? People will say that they’re not proud but watch when someone disrespects them publicly. What happens when someone is more successful than me or when someone is smarter than me. Do I feel anger and bitterness on the inside? Why is this person better looking than me? Why does everything good happen to this person and not to me? It’s my right. I should have it. We don’t realise it until we’re humbled and humiliated, we have no idea that we are filled with pride.

Everyone suffers from this to some extent – it is the basic human condition. Jesus, once again teaches us how to overcome. His death and His essence is so beyond our comprehension that we can’t even begin to fathom it, yet this same very God emptied Himself of all His glory and every right that He had, yet He had all the rights.

He was crucified, He was poor, He had nothing. If God emptied himself of His glory and humbled Himself, then we must. There is no disrespect, no humiliation, no embarrassment that could ever compare to what Christ has gone through.

When we hold a grudge, respond in hatred, act petty, with envy, with jealousy and cannot forgive, we are not acting to be God, we are making ourselves out to be far above God. When we are humbled, we apologise when we feel like we shouldn’t, we accept disrespect the same as you would respect. That is when you are behaving like God.

The last temptation is the lust of the eyes. The fruit was pleasant to the eyes and this is the human desire. I look at everyone around me and I want what they have. I’m never satisfied with what I have. This is the curse of Western civilisation. Jesus once again teaches us how to overcome this. He was baptised and immediately He fled to the desert to the wilderness. Saint Arsenius says, there’s one way to overcome this world. Flee, be silent, and be still.

Wealth, investments, and status are only attractive because we have nothing to compare it to. If we go to the wilderness, away from the noise and distractions and find God, we realise all of these things are counted as nothing. They’re relatively meaningless. It doesn’t mean we don’t work and try to achieve in all the things we do, but they have no hold over me.  If I have them, thanks be to God if I lose them. We have to recognise that there is nothing external that can satisfy me, only what is within.

Christ says “Behold, the kingdom of Heaven is within you.” It’s only what’s within me that can satisfy me. We are made in the image of God, in His likeness. If you want to find Christ, retreat to yourself. There you will find him.

Let’s focus on retreating into my inner deserts. Let’ take the opportunity to utilise that quiet. Retreat into your bedroom and find Christ there. If you go into your bedroom and open your heart before God, you will find the pearl of great price that Christ talks about. When you find the pearl of great price Christ says, you will sell everything you have to get that pearl.

Let’s overcome the temptations like Christ showed us by hungering from physical comfort. We are nourished by the word of God, which is Jesus Christ, by emptying ourselves of our pride, sacrificing ourselves and living for others and finally retreating into the wilderness, into the silence and stillness, to encounter God who is within me.