The Comparison Game

Talents, Blessings and Spiritual Gifts Part 1

The Comparison Game

By Ereeny Mikhail


“I don’t think I am talented at anything.”
“If only I was prettier or smarter.”
“If I am not one of the best at it, then I am not talented.”
“I just wish I had more money.”
“But so-and-so is more spiritual than me.”
“I am not worthy enough.”

How many times have you heard someone you know say one of these statements or something similar? In fact, I think most of us have fallen into that trap at some point in our lives. In this day and age, we are exposed to so much information and content via the internet, social media, books, talks and the like. And often, the line between what is true and false, right and wrong, and good and bad, becomes blurred. We see an incredibly talented individual and we think there’s no point trying because we will never be as good. We see people share their success and think what we have is not enough. And we see one another spiritually progress and feel we are left behind, drowned in our own sin.

One of the greatest pitfalls of how we perceive our talents, blessings and spiritual gifts, is comparison.

The Oxford dictionary defines a talent (n). as ‘a natural aptitude or skill’. This natural aptitude or skill can come in many forms. Some of us are good speakers, some of us are artistic, some of us are financially gifted, some of us are talented at sports, some of us are musically inclined and so on. However, what I find most striking about the definition is it does not in any way state that we need to be at the top of the game. We simply should just know how to do a certain thing to be talented. St Paul, in II Corinthians 10:12, states, “For we dare not class ourselves or compare ourselves with those who commend themselves. But they are measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.”

Take this for example, two women take a painting class together. Both women had good paintings, and enjoy painting, but one painting is totally abstract, and the other is perfect to the last stroke. Now, let me pose the question. Who is more talented? Is it the woman who had an abstract painting or the woman who is a perfectionist? The answer is actually both. Not one painter is better or more talented. Both are there for a purpose. One artwork is for the person who enjoys looking at something relaxed and expresses a bit of chaos in their art. The other is for the eye that loves to see everything in a particular place at a particular time. The point of the story is talent is not defined as something you are better at than someone else. It is defined as something that someone just naturally knows how to do, which in this case, both women enjoyed the activity, and knew how to do it, in different ways.

Sometimes the key to recognising your talent is stop comparing your talents to other people. That very person that you look at and think that your talents are insignificant compared to, probably looks at you in the same light. This breeds jealousy, contempt, insecurity and so much more that is harmful to our inner selves.

Further to this, what kind of friend do you want to be? The one that compares yourself and is trying to do better than those around you, or the one that supports, encourages and tries to build the talents of those around us?

When we stop comparing ourselves to others, we begin to see the beauty in the differences we possess. We see each individual as part of the body of Christ. A fearfully and wonderfully made masterpiece, that could never compare to another.

Friendship is…

Friendship is…

Reposted from Lilies and Thorns blog


”You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” “Tell me who your friends are, and I’ll tell you who you are.” “You become who you hang out with.” “If you want to see your future, look at your friends.” “When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends” “You are who you are, by virtue of the company you keep.” Any of these sound familiar? Friendships are a crucial part of life, and the influence of friends on you is undeniable.

Friendship is First Loving Yourself

We should all aim to have a friendship like David and Jonathan. “Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul.” (1 Samuel 18:3) First, it’s important to note that they loved their own soul, and therefore were able to love each other with that same vigor. We should not be looking for someone else’s validation in a friendship. Before we chase love from others, we have to know our worth, and love ourselves first. We should not be looking to friends to fill the insecurities we have. Yes, they will encourage us and help us reach a better place, but getting rid of our insecurities is a journey between us and God.

If we fail to first love and invest in ourselves, we risk unknowingly placing a burden on our precious friends to fill that void for us, and this can be fatal to friendships. By knowing where we stand with God, we organically attract friends who are able to complement our beliefs, ambitions, and lifestyles.

Friendship is Built on Similar Values

Another common saying is “birds of a feather flock together.” This just means people who have the same interest and values tend to stick together. I can definitely attest to this in my life. I’ve had many friends throughout the years, but the one group of friends that I’ve kept for over 20 years are the ones I met in church. I’ve changed neighborhoods, schools, and even church parishes, but I’ve never changed my faith. Faith is an extremely strong tie that can withstand any time and place. So I hope you can find a God-loving group of friends that can help you stay on the right track. I’m not saying don’t have non-Christian friends; as long as they’re not a bad influence, have all the friends you want. You want friends to bring you closer to Christ (as you should also be doing for them), not further away from Him.

Friendship is Investing Both Ways

We’ve all had friends that make more withdrawals out of the friendship account than deposits. Some people require a lot of energy and attention, but don’t provide the same in return. Sometimes those friendships can leave us feeling drained. The seemingly Christian thing to do is to keep loving and giving, but I recognize we’re all human and might not always be able to handle the load. So maybe it might be time to cut back on the abundant giving, and don’t have such high expectations. I’m not saying cut them off, I’m just saying find a happy middle ground where you are both putting in the same effort into the friendship, that way there is no resentment or heavy feelings.

Friendship is Knowing What Load to Carry

“Do not be deceived: ‘Evil company corrupts good habits.’” (1 Corinthians 15:33) I’m cringing as I write this part, but the truth can be hard to face sometimes. There are times when friendships do more harm than good. I like to lean towards giving the other person the benefit of the doubt, and believing they have good intentions. But sometimes those intentions fail to show in their actions. If you find yourself in a friendship that is affecting you negatively, then it might be time to move on. I say this with caution, and urge you to consult your father of confession to seek guidance in the situation. I do not want you to stay in an unhealthy friendship (or any relationship) because you feel obligated to carry someone else’s load, when you can barely carry your own, and in fact, it is weighing you down.

Friendship is Edifying

Edifying friendships are the most beautiful friendships, and I pray you can all find them and keep them. My longest friendship started about 20 years ago, when I moved to America. Throughout the years we have journeyed together through middle school, high school, college, singleness, marriage, and now motherhood. We’ve leaned on each other countless times, always drawing strength from the Lord to give to each other. Our friendship was a two-way street of giving and taking. We’ve shared wonderful memories and hard ones too.

We’ve had our ups and downs, just like any normal friendship. We’ve had times where we didn’t see eye to eye, or misunderstood each other. But the one common thing that kept us together was our common love for God and each other, because “A friend loves at all times.” (Proverbs 17:17) In every situation we tried to see the best in the other person. We constantly communicated, even when the conversations were hard to have. When we found ourselves in uncomfortable situations, we stopped and tried to mend it. Not saying our friendship is perfect, but perfectly imperfect. And that’s the beauty of it.

God gave us friends so we can lift each other up.

Two are better than one, Because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, For he has no one to help him up.”

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

We can try to convince ourselves that we can go through life alone, but man, that can be super hard. Truth is, we need each other. The Bible says so, and even Christ sent out the apostles in groups of two.

If you are in a season in your life where you don’t have a strong friendship(s), then by all means ask God to send you a friend or two. Doesn’t He say, “Ask and it shall be given to you”? (Matthew 7:7)

I pray that you can all have fruitful and edifying friendships that bring you closer to Him, as well as be a great friend that someone can depend on. We should all be holding each other’s hands so we can help each other reach His.

“Ointment and perfume delight the heart, And the sweetness of a man’s friend gives delight by hearty counsel.”

Proverbs 27:9

Gird your Waist with Truth

The Armour of God Part 1

Gird your Waist with Truth

By David Tadros


How many times are we inclined to rest our hands on our waist due to our fatigue, as if it is our main source of support? Did you know that the girdle used in war serves the purpose of strengthening the soldier’s waist, that is, his foundation of support? So then, what does it mean when we say to gird our waists with truth? And how does this truth give strength to our spiritual foundation, that we are in need of in our daily struggle with temptation?  

To gird, or to secure one’s waist with truth, is a concept that is reflected on by St Paul in his letter to the church of Ephesus. But before we begin to understand what it means to gird our waists with truth, we must understand what the truth is that St Paul is denoting.

‘From what we read of the Lord our Savior, throughout the Scriptures, it is manifestly clear that the whole armour of Christ is the Saviour Himself. It is He whom we are asked to “put on.” It is one and the same thing to say “Put on the whole armour of God” and “Put on the Lord Jesus Christ.” Our belt is truth and our breastplate is righteousness. The Savior is also called both “truth” and “righteousness.” So no one can doubt that He Himself is that very belt and breastplate.’ – St Jerome

In this light we are able to see that, in fact, all the different pieces of the armour of God are indeed referring to Christ! And when we put on the armour of God, we are putting on Christ Himself. We become enveloped by His power and protection and He becomes our defence. Just as the soldier’s foundation of support is strengthened by his girdle, so too is our spiritual foundation strengthened when we gird our waists with Christ, the Truth. Through this strength from Christ we can then stand, like St Paul says, to the wiles of the devil.

Who then is able to receive this truth, that is Christ?

25 At that time Jesus answered and said, “I thank You, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that You have hidden these things from the wise and prudent and have revealed them to babes. 26 Even so, Father, for so it seemed good in Your sight. Matthew 11:25-26

The real truth is not for the wise, nor those with high intellect, but rather it is revealed to the babes. It is for those who are simple in their ways, trusting God in all things and for all things. Even for the simple, this truth is not made up by their own understanding but rather it comes as a revelation from Christ. Therefore, we must humble ourselves to the simplicity of babes so we may accept the truth, that is Christ. For to those who are called saints, to them the mystery of truth has been revealed.  For as it says in Colossians 1:26-27,

“2the mystery which has been hidden from ages and from generations, but now has been revealed to His saints. 27 To them God willed to make known what are the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles: which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.”

Let us then seek and gird our waist with the Truth, that is Christ, with all humility, in the hope that we may receive His strength against the temptations of the devil.